Believing in yourself is the first secret to success

Believing in yourself – a critical step on the path to success

​Sometimes the difference in whether you succeed or whether you don’t comes down to one simple thing – believing in yourself. Have you ever thought about how much believing in yourself makes a difference in your quality of life? Think about it for a minute. If you don’t really believe that you can do something, you are not going to give your full effort and, without your full effort, your chances of successfully achieving your goal are greatly reduced.

Also, if your goal requires help from others, you then need them to believe in you. If you don’t believe in yourself; why would they believe in you. Every successful goal that you ever achieve will have one common thing that they require i.e. that you believe in yourself.

​The Do’s and Don’ts of Self-Esteem

Self-esteem is all about believing in yourself and your abiltiy to shape your own life. You can discover the Do’s and Don’ts of Self-Esteem with my FREE Checklist.

Why believing in yourself is so important:

A strong belief in yourself can bring you all these benefits and more:

​Wouldn’t you love to enjoy these qualities of confidence and well-being on a daily basis? The good news is you can! There are actions you can take to fortify your belief in yourself.

Believing in yourself made easy

​Whether you feel lacking in this area or just want to strengthen your belief for the extra benefits, try these ideas to further develop your self-belief:

1. Have confidence in your own abilities to get something done

Be your own best cheerleader and encourage yourself to get your tasks done. Learn to break down your challenges into small steps until you know that you can do it.

I learned this tactic when my business was struggling. I knew what I wanted to achieve in the long run but I lacked confidence in my ability to make it happen. So, instead of being overwhelmed by the big picture, I got into the habit of setting 90 day plans to bring myself closer to achieving the big goal.

I would then break the 90 day plan down into monthly targets and finally, daily actions. I could then focus on the daily actions which I had enough confidence to pursue.

Believing in yourself can be difficult when you are facing a big and daunting goal but when you break it down into bitesize actions, it becomes so much easier.

The support of others will definitely benefit you, but it is you who must make the changes necessary for you to start believing in yourself.

​Key Point

If you are going to start believing in yourself, it is you who must make the change. Others cannot make you believe in yourself; they can only be supportive. If a goal seems too big for you, then keep breaking it down until you reach a point where you do believe you can do it. You can then grow your self-belief from there.

​Unlock your self-esteem

​Take the first giant strides towards truly believing in yourself with ‘Unlock Your Self-Esteem.’

2. Create dreams

Whether it’s getting the career you want, obtaining more training, meeting someone you admire, traveling to a faraway place, or setting a goal to save a million dollars; connect with your dreams.

We often get put off from pursuing our dreams because we don’t believe in our ability to make them happen. What we forget is that it takes time to achieve a big goal/dream. In the time it takes to achieve that goal/dream, you also have the time to acquire the knowledge, skills and attitudes required to achieve it.

Don’t base your beliefs in tomorrow’s success on the abilities you possess today. Believe in your ability to learn and grow.

When you create a vision or dream for the life you want, you give yourself something to aim for. You have criteria which you can use to make your decisions and; you start to realise that you do not have to be great at everything. All you really need ​to do is ​develop a few key skills and some specific knowledge.

Just knowing that you don’t need to be great at everything can take away a great deal of self-doubt.

​Key Point

Sometimes your difficulties in believing in yourself can stem from the fact that you haven’t really given yourself anything to believe in. When you develop a clear vision for what you want, start developing strategies for realising that vision and start achieving small goals along the way; you increase your self-belief, one small step at a time.

3. Establish goals and go for the gold

Believing in yourself means you’re motivated to get things done. Get into the habit of setting goals (both short-term and long-term). Then, you can take active steps to achieve them. With every goal that you achieve, no matter how small, your confidence will increase.

Believing in yourself is not some miracle of fate; it comes from creating a track record of achievement. That track record starts with setting goals.

It is not just the completion and achievement of the goal which increases your self-belief. As you complete each task along the way to the achievement of the goals, you give yourself a little boost.

It is easy to think that self-belief is something that you either have or ​you don’t or; that it comes in one moment. But that couldn’t be further from the truth. Self-belief is built step by step, action by action. Lacking self-belief is not a sign of failure, it is just a sign that you need to start building ​that belief..

​Key Point

Goals are a very effective way to build your self-belief because properly set goals require you to stretch a little outside of your comfort zone; causing you to expand your comfort zone as you achieve the goal.

​Related

​If you don’t have any goals or dreams, check out the Ultimate Guide to Goal Setting.

4. Treat yourself well

Treating yourself with a nurturing nature and the understanding that you’re a deserving human being is an important aspect of developing belief in yourself.

As you begin to see yourself as worthy of being treated with respect, others begin to get that message too. For those who don’t get that message, you will come to the realisation that they should have no place in your life.

We all know how it is important to treat others with respect and dignity. When they screw up, we usually go easy on them because we know that we make mistakes too. We understand that mistakes are a natural part of life.

Unfortunately, when we make the mistake ourselves; all that goes out the window. Rather than treat ourselves with respect and dignity, accepting that it was an honest mistake; we berate and admonish ourselves.

When we behave like this, we send a message to ourselves that we are not of value and, we can’t be trusted. We send the same message to anyone who witnesses our over the top behaviour.

Treat yourself with respect and care and then demand the same from others.

​Key Point

It is often said that you should treat others as you would like to be treated yourself. It is just as important to treat yourself with the same respect and dignity that you would offer to others.

​It is often said that you should treat others as you would like to be treated yourself. It is just as important to treat yourself with the same respect and dignity that you would offer to others.

5. Ensure motivation is high

Remember the childhood story about the little engine that could? When you want to accomplish your tasks with excellence and achieve your goals, it’s an incredible testament to your level of motivation. Build momentum to fuel your motivation.

To ensure your motivation for your biggest goals, take the time to understand why you want to achieve them. You should also regularly take the time to visualise your life as it will be once you have achieved the goal i.e. you will be living the benefits.

The old saying that where there is a will there is a way is very true. When you reinforce your motivation like this, you will create an iron-clad will to achieve your goal and you will find a way to make it happen. Believing in yourself is that powerful.

​Key Point

When you build your motivation and create a strong enough desire, you will often find that you don’t have to think about whether you can or cannot do something. Your desire is so strong that you just start working on it. You become determined to ‘do it or die trying.’ Again, as you progress, you build your self-belief each step of the way.

6. During the tough times, keep the faith

No one is immune from experiencing rocky chapters in his life. But if you believe in yourself, you can meet those challenging phases with a positive, solid fortitude. You’ll push forward, move through the trying moments and know you’ll come out on the other side smarter, stronger and surer of yourself.

During the tough times, remind yourself of how you have gotten through tough times before. Think about how you had the resilience and toughness to get through it. Summon that resilience and you will soon start to fight back.

Then, as with the first step in this article, focus on what you can do on a daily basis to come out on the other side of the difficulties. You will gain even more confidence as you take each step but you must start with some self-belief.

Life is a journey and like any other journey, you are going to take some wrong turns. You are going to need to correct your course from time to time. So, don’t let setbacks get to you. Just identify the changes you need to make, make them and move on.

​Key Point

It can be of great value to keep a record of the tough times that you go through and, how you got through them. This will help you to keep believing in yourself when things go wrong. Because things will go wrong but, if you are prepared to adjust your course, you have nothing to fear and, plenty to learn from these tough experiences.

Believing in yourself is the secret to success

All of us, as individuals, need to feel motivated and gratified, both at work and in our daily life. Motivation is like active energy that should be constantly nourished, thanks to the recognition and celebration of successes. At SIAL we know that positive encouragement plays an extremely important role in the social, emotional and academic development of each of our students and we try to carry it forward every day.

President Abraham Lincoln once said, “I am a successful person today because I had a friend who believed in me and I did not have the courage to disappoint him.” At SIAL we want to be that friend, because we know how important it is to help children believe in themselves. This is what we do every day, when we explain to our children that skills are developed through practice and that even failures help us to grow. Indeed, failures give us the right incentive to improve ourselves and to ask for more from ourselves.

We believe a positive attitude is like a fly-wheel for increasing self-confidence and therefore motivation. At SIAL we like to recognise and celebrate when our children behave well.

This is part of the reason we adopt our House system. We have four Houses, to which each child is assigned at the time of entry to our school. Through this system we have created a program that aims to develop motivation and self-confidence in each student: every week the children are rewarded with stars (or house points) for various reasons, such as kindness, cooperation, self-discipline and respect as well as excellent academic work and thinking. This system helps us to promote and recognise the importance of hard work, determination, consideration for others and community participation. All skills that will be constant during our children’s growth and that will provide them with an adequate preparation for any consequent phases of their lives.

Find out more about our pastoral care and get in touch if you would like to attend an open day or book a school tour.

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Believe In Yourself – Inspirational Speech by Ashley Zahabian

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Available on iTunes | Spotify | Google Play or Amazon MP3

It doesn’t matter what anyone says you can or can’t do. It doesn’t matter what opinions others have for your life, and what they consider possible. If you BELIEVE IN YOURSELF, then ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!

Believe In Yourself – Inspirational Speech – Transcript:

Why is it we don’t believe it ourselves?
That as soon as things get tough in our lives we start doubting ourselves
We start thinking that we may not make it
Stressing, worrying, imagining things that may go wrong in the future

We need to understand, the human mind is the most powerful tool we own, but it can also be the most DESTRUCTIVE…
And we need to learn how to take control of the direction of our mind and our emotions

You mind is going to provide you your greatest challenges in life, because it is so powerful
So, if you can conquer your mind, you can pretty much conquer anything else around you, literally.

When writing the story of your life – make sure YOU hold the pen.
Make sure not only that you hold the pen, but you write the script from your heart. Be brave when writing your script, it’s your story and there are NO LIMITS to what you can have, what you can do or what you can be.

How bad do you want it?
You have to prove it to yourself that you want it bad enough, it’s gotta hurt you not to get it.
And that’s when you’re going to learn to conquer your mind. Your mind will no longer be able to say no, because your inner heart and mind are aligned, and now NOTHING can stop you!

It’s easy to be all positive and consistent when everything is going your way
But that’s not life, that’s not realistic!
Are you going to be one of the very few to stand up when things are tough, when everything is going against you.
Will you be able to believe in what’s right, and what brings results to your life.
THAT’S WHEN YOUR CHARACTER WILL SHINE!
THAT’S WHEN YOUR STORY WILL BE BORN!
YOUR story is valuable!
YOUR story of success!

You can’t build a STORY if you stop now. If you give up.
The world is full of people who gave up.
THE WORLD NEEDS HOPE. WE ALL DO.
The world needs you to STAND UP – to fight through your challenging moments,
To SHINE through the dark times
To love through the hate, and to be the difference in an indifferent world.
To BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

Most people are bloated with ordinary thoughts and mindsets
They’re so full of average that they have no more appetite
But you have to have an appetite for EXTRAORDINARY
Beyond what people are doing – think beyond them

THERE WILL ALWAYS BE DOUBTERS, and people below you, and people trying to put you down so they can feel higher, but you gotta STAY TRUE TO YOURSELF.
BELIEVE in your mind. Have some tunnel vision.
Then one day you will have your moment.
Because ANYTHING is possible if you just BELIEVE!

FEED your DREAMS.
If you can suffer through setbacks, through pain, RISE up with resilience once again, and again, and again!
ONE DAY THIS WORLD WILL TAP YOU ON THE SHOULDER & say… “This is your time to shine”
YOU CAN HAVE BE AND DO ANYTHING YOU WANT
You just have to believe

What did you think of Ashley Zahabian’s delivery and passion? Do you believe in yourself? Let us know in the comments below.

How to Believe In Yourself (in 5 Simple Steps)

The level of success you see in your life is a direct result of your belief system.

I’m not talking about religion or philosophy here. What I mean is your belief in your ability to succeed.

Believing in yourself means having faith in your own capabilities. It means believing that you CAN do something — that it is within your ability. When you believe in yourself, you can overcome self-doubt and have the confidence to take action and get things done.

That’s why I’m offering these powerful steps to overcome the obstacles in the way of your self-confidence.

If you want to accelerate this process, you can learn how to overcome self-doubt and take action (in just one week) with our new mini-course Believing in Yourself. Start your journey today!

5 Steps to Confidently Believing in Yourself

Once you solidify your belief in yourself, success is 100% possible for you.

1. Work on your strengths (not weaknesses)

When you fail over and over at something that seems easy to others, it’s nearly impossible to believe in yourself.

Struggling with confidence, you tend to focus on things you can’t do. That’s because you feel weaknesses more keenly. They are painfully highlighted in your mind, symbols of shame, weakness, and failure.

“I’m bad at this,” quickly escalates to, “I’ll never be good at anything!”

You need to determine how to identify your strengths, so that you can get the most mileage out of them.

The solution to start building confidence right away:

Stop spinning your wheels at things you aren’t wired for.

Discover what you are already good at, and work at becoming g reat.

A common habit of successful people is to focus on the positive — what they excel at — and delegate weaknesses to others instead of worrying about not measuring up.

Maybe you know some of your strengths. To get some ideas, think about how people might describe you:

Talk to your family, close friends, and colleagues about what your strengths are. What are some things they come to you for help with? You’re not fishing for compliments, though sometimes this exercise can come with a confidence boost.

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Knowing your strengths will allow you to put more of your effort into areas you’re already talented in. You can grow in the ways you’re naturally inclined.

Once you are working from a base of strength and belief in your abilities, you can find resources to tackle anything.

Recognizing your natural abilities (and inabilities) gives you permission to stop banging your head against a wall. You can do what you do best, and find workarounds for the rest.

For example, starting a business requires many skills, but you don’t have to own them all:

Use your strengths to your advantage. This approach will bring out your confidence as you focus on using your best skills. Shifting everything else off of your plate gives you the power to be awesome at what you do best.

Your strengths are what make you unique. Develop these qualities and depend on them.

2. Be your own coach

If you don’t believe in yourself, you won’t believe someone who is cheering you on from the sidelines. That’s why a great small business coach leads their clients to success not by cheerleading, but by developing talent.

Great coaches, and managers, lead by empowering people to succeed with the right tools, education, and resources to become excellent. They interact with people using approaches like Conversational Intelligence to put people at ease and bring out the best in everyone.

The research shows that positive thinking, goal setting, and performance reviews don’t create results on their own. When you don’t believe you have what it takes, none of those things are a magic bullet.

So how can you take advantage of this knowledge, and coach yourself?

Seek out the tools and education to develop your talent. Take action.

Each step you take, moving closer to your goal, is evidence of your ability to succeed. Believing in yourself will become easier and easier, the more you see your success reflected back to you.

The secret is, you don’t need another person to work through this process. You don’t need to possess qualities of leadership to coach yourself through it.

The trick is to learn more about yourself without being judgmental.

Start by journaling on where you want to be in life. Write out all the things you want to have, and the kind of person you want to be. From this, you can come up with strategies to get to that point.

Choosing ideas that suit you — and working with your strengths — can propel you towards your own vision of success.

You can also write out the parts of your life that you’re unhappy with. Create action steps, and find the resources, to improve any of these areas:

By identifying the parts of your life that you’re least satisfied with and keeping an eye on where you ultimately want to be, create long term goals that are manageable for you.

Set one big goal at a time, and break it down into smaller parts. Succeeding in taking each small action step, no matter how tiny, leads to visible progress.

Ultimately, these consistent small successes add up to self-belief and massive confidence.

Over time, you start to see that you can achieve anything you put your mind to — because you are already doing it.

3. Embrace who you are

How can you have faith in yourself when you don’t know who you really are? Or worse, you are trying hard to be someone you’re not.

Self-confidence comes from embracing who you are and what’s important to you. It does not come from being inauthentic or trying to impress people.

Easier said than done.

The pressure to fit in, to “be normal,” is strong, and it starts early. That’s fine if you want to live an unremarkable life. But you’re here, reading this article, because that’s not the life for you. You want something more.

To start believing you can have the life you want, you must dig deep to discover what that will look like for you. You must understand what makes you unique, and celebrate those things.

When you begin living true to your identity and core values, you will start believing in your worth, your abilities, and your human potential. Core values are the foundation for forming your personal philosophy to guide your actions going forward.

Embracing yourself is best done in baby steps:

Start by writing down what’s important to you.

You’ll want to do this several times over weeks, or even months. Each time you’ll get closer to uncovering your core values.

This will help you to see through the things you’ve been conditioned to believe in. When you’re finished, you’ll have a list of traits that represent your truest self.

Observe your patterns of thought and behavior.

Do you often cater to others at the expense of your own values? When you think you’re being nice or keeping the peace, ask yourself why. The end result is that you dull your own shine and live for other people’s approval.

When you feel this internal conflict happening, work on addressing it. You can kindly say no, assert a different opinion, or let someone know that what they’ve done has hurt you.

Some people might not like the “new you,” and that’s OK. They can play a more limited role in your life. Fortunately, when you’re authentically you, the right people will be drawn to you, and real friendships will grow even stronger.

Step out from the expectations of others.

Being authentic feels like a big risk, and you might be afraid of criticism. Remember that your experience of life is about you, and their experience of life is about them.

Doing things that scare you will solidify the confidence you need to be your truest self. It sounds counter-intuitive, but being vulnerable — accepting your fear and not hiding it — is the surest path to building strength.

Make time for adventures that are completely out of your normal routine. It could be jumping out of a plane, taking a fitness class, or picking up a paintbrush. Pick something that seems fun but scares you at least a little bit and jump in.

You can learn so much about yourself from these activities that you should engage in them regularly. Add variety and do new things often.

4. Believe you can and you will

Your belief is the single most powerful tool you have. You can completely change your life just by changing your beliefs.

It’s not wishful thinking — believing something changes the way you see the world and yourself.

You either see possibilities, or insurmountable obstacles.

Which will you choose?

To start believing in yourself, you have to stop believing you are stuck with the skills and abilities you have right now. This is called a fixed mindset, which is a limited thinking pattern that’s fatal to your success.

Instead, start believing you can change. This way of thinking is called a growth mindset. It means that you believe change is possible.

Deeply believing that you and your life can change for the better is the driving force behind all of your efforts. You will then be more willing, and even excited, to put in the work required to make those changes.

There is no greater confidence booster than seeing the results of your work. But you must believe it’s worthwhile or you will never put in the effort.

In her TED Talk, Meg Jay tells young people to forget about their identity crisis and start building identity capital. Don’t waste another second thinking:

Building identity capital means doing things that add value to who you are. Start investing time and effort in becoming that “someone” you want to be.

If you don’t have confidence in your skills or abilities, even your appearance, get to work improving:

By believing that change is possible, you’ll be consciously choosing ways to grow.

There is nothing stopping you. Whatever your dream is, once you wholeheartedly believe that it’s possible for you, that’s when the adventure truly begins.

5. Be uncomfortable

If what you did today looks a lot like what you did yesterday, and last week, and three years ago — you’re too comfortable. You’re in a pattern and it’s getting you exactly nowhere.

To make real change in your life you have to get uncomfortable. You have to step out of your cozy box and do things differently.

This means making a greater effort and even feeling a bit weird doing things that are out of the ordinary.

Do the weird things anyway.

You have this whole life to experiment with who you are. It’s your life and you don’t need to live it to anyone’s expectations but your own. If you want a different life, make it yourself.

Through experimenting and acting on your ideas, your capabilities and potential are reflected back at you.

Experimenting with different skills, approaches, and tactics in your life is one of the best ways to build confidence and foster mental toughness. Sure, it’s uncomfortable! New things always are.

Fortunately, when you start to do more new things, the fear becomes fun. You get to learn so much from trying new things, whether or not you succeed in the attempt.

There are challenges. Part of the process means getting over negative self-talk, fear of failure, and imposter syndrome. You may have to face genuine anxiety and work on ways to manage it.

Every single person who has done any kind of self-improvement will tell you that these feelings are very real. They’ll tell you it’s scary, but the results are worth it.

Each time you step into something new there will be fear. Your power lies in walking through that fear and doing the thing anyway.

The power of believing you can improve

The magic happens by simply believing it’s possible. Your belief in possibility is necessary to the work, the experimentation, and the consistency needed to change your life.

This belief in possibility is what provided rock stars with the single-minded intensity to get on stage every night, in the face of ridiculous odds.

It’s what gave famous authors the tenacity to keep writing and editing after countless rejected manuscripts.

It’s what kept star athletes training, through pain, injury, and loss, until they made it to the top.

Now you have some tools to start believing in yourself. Work on these steps consistently, and you will begin to see amazing things happening in your life.

If you are looking to accelerate your process of self-belief, take my mini-course Believing in Yourself.