How to express condolences in english

Helpful Tips on Expressing Condolences

Expressing condolences isn’t easy. We’ll share helpful tips and alternatives to saying, “I’m sorry for your loss.”

Sending condolences can help your loved ones through difficult times.

Expressing condolences to someone grieving the loss of a loved one is difficult to do. Many people fear saying the wrong thing or getting the timing wrong. Below, we will discuss what it means to express condolences, other ways of saying “I’m sorry for your loss,” and helpful tips to keep in mind to help you express condolences.

Sending condolences or expressions of sympathy can help your loved one during the grieving process.

What Does “Condolences” Mean?

Condolence, almost always used in the plural form—condolences—is “an expression of sympathy, especially in the event of a death.” It’s a message you send to your colleague, friend, family member, or anyone else you know to tell them you recognize their loss and that they are in your thoughts.

Please accept my deepest condolences for the loss of your grandfather. He was loved by many.

Are There Other Ways to Express Condolences?

I’m sorry for your loss is a common phrase used when sharing an expression of sympathy. There is nothing wrong with this phrase, but if you want to send something different or more personal, consider the following alternatives:

You can also personalize the sentiment, depending on how well you know the grieving person and the person who passed away. Here are a few examples of more personal condolences:

I feel privileged to have met Joseph. He always lit up any room he walked into and had the special ability to make anyone laugh without even trying. My heart aches for you during this difficult time.

I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your aunt. She was an inspiring, charismatic, and kind woman. She meant a lot to this community. Please know that I am here for you.

I know there’s nothing I can say to make you feel better as you grieve the loss of your grandmother. She truly was a special person who will be missed by many. Please accept my deepest condolences.

What Should I Keep in Mind When Expressing Condolences?

There are a few phrases that should be avoided when expressing condolences.

This expression should be especially avoided if you’re unsure about the grieving person’s view on religion or the afterlife. It’s also overused, so it’s best to steer clear from it.

Even if you experienced a similar loss, expressing condolences should be about the grieving person, not about what you have gone through.

Death can seem nonsensical to someone who is grieving. Do not force them to try to see the positive in their loss. Give them the time and space they need to grieve.

Similar to the previous expression, do not coerce someone into trying to see the silver lining. Instead, acknowledge their pain.

Tips on Sending Condolences

When sending condolences, remember these tips:

Take into account that every situation is different. You may be compelled to look for the best words to help your loved one during a difficult time. But remember, what’s important when expressing condolences is that the person receiving your message knows you’re there for them or are thinking of them.

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How to express your condolences in English

Sometimes we wish that the people closest to us would remain by our side forever.

However, sooner or later, it’s time to say goodbye. Sadness overwhelms us and we enter a period that in English is known as grieving or mourning.

When someone close to you experiences the passing of a loved one, a hug, a comforting word, and above all, our presence, is an important means of support.

Sending condolence messages isn’t easy. The situation can often be overwhelming and leave us at a loss for words.

In this lesson, we want to teach you some expressions that will be very useful to express your condolences in English to whoever needs them. Do you want to learn them?

Showing empathy

The word “condolence” comes from the Latin “condolere” which means “to suffer together”. Empathy has to do with knowing how to put yourself in each other’s shoes and trying to understand what is happening. Therefore, our condolence message should say that we share their pain or grief.

Regardless of whether you are close to the person or barely know them, you can use the following short, heartfelt phrases:

I am (so) sorry for your loss.

My heartfelt condolences.

My deepest sympathies.

I was heartbroken when I heard the sad news.

Sometimes there are no words

You may feel that words are not enough to bring comfort to the bereaved person.

If you want to express this feeling, you can use the following expressions:

Words cannot express my sorrow for your loss.

Words fall short of expressing my sorrow for your loss.

Words can’t express how saddened we are to hear of your loss.

If you feel that it is difficult for you to say this out loud, you can send a condolence message via email, text message, or printed or virtual card. There, you can expand on these words, recalling some of the virtues of the person who has passed away. If you feel confident, you can let them know that they can count on you for any help they might need.

I am here for you if you need anything.

If you need anything, just let me know.

If you need anything, please ask.

If you use our app, you can listen to the podcast “Meditation, dealing with grief” in which we explore some of the thoughts that can help you get through this difficult time.

Saying that you’re going to miss someone

When a person leaves, they leave a lot of behind. When we’re with our family, we can recall some anecdotes that highlight that person’s qualities.

He/She will be missed.

I will never forget when he/she…

You were such a dedicated friend/daughter/brother/sister to…

There are more details that you can use to express your solidarity: a flower arrangement, a call, or a donation. In the end, the most important thing will be your presence and your genuine interest in the other person, who will definitely thank you for it.

We hope that you’ve learnt to easily express your condolences in English.

Keep visiting our blog to find a variety of interesting material that will help you supplement your learning.

If you want to take your English to the next level, you can also sign up for our course with hundreds of practical lessons and varied content in different formats so that you can learn English with what you like.

Download the app for free and enjoy the multimedia content from the comfort of your smartphone.

How to Express Condolence

When someone you know has suffered the loss of a close friend or family member, it is important to let them know you are thinking of them. If course, it is difficult to know how best to express your condolences to someone who is recently bereaved but bear in mind that simply making contact and showing they are in your thoughts will be some comfort.

What does sending condolence mean?

Sending your condolences means contacting someone who is recently bereaved and offering some words of comfort or sympathy for their loss. It is a way of acknowledging that they are grieving and showing that you care about them. There are an infinite number of ways to write a message of condolence.

When is the best time to send your condolences?

This probably depends on the nature of your relationship with the person who is experiencing loss. If you enjoy a close relationship either with the bereaved or the deceased, you should make contact as soon as possible. If you are a casual friend or part of a wider social circle, it’s fine to send condolences within a few days or just after the funeral.

How to send a messages of condolence

A hand-written note or card is still the most traditional way to offer a formal message of condolence. You can simply send a letter or chose a blank card and devise your own words. Keeping it simple is probably best so soon after their loved one has passed.

Although many of us frequently communicate via text or email, this is one instance where you should consider if this is the most appropriate choice. Text and email contact has the advantage of speed – as does a telephone call or visit of course. But on the other hand, a card or letter takes more effort and can seem more personal.

A word of warning regarding social media. It would not be right to offer condolences on Facebook or Twitter unless the bereaved person has already used these public platforms to acknowledge their feelings. This is a difficult time so be careful about inadvertently announcing the news by way of condolence on social media – even if your motives are clearly kind. As a general rule, take your lead from their online communication and tone.

How to Express Condolences

When a person dies it is difficult to know what to say to the bereaved. If English is your second language, it is even harder to comfort a grieving person. We sometimes use a present tense verb when we should use the past. Don’t feel bad if you do this. Even native English speakers find this awkward in the early hours and days after a person’s passing.

It is important to acknowledge the loss in one form or another. Here are a few expressions you can use to express your care and concern in English when someone passes away.

Expressing Condolences in English
It is a good idea to name the person who died. If you know this person, describe something you loved about him or her. Share a fond memory if you have one. If you don’t know the person, express sadness that you never got to meet him or her or acknowledge the importance of this person to your friend.

Expressing Condolences in Writing

When you are looking for a card in a stationery shop look for “sympathy” cards. You can use many of the same expressions in a sympathy note or card.

Words to go with a sympathy gift or donation
Please accept these flowers from our family.
I have made a donation to _____________ (charity or organization) in ________________ (name’s) honour.
As per your request, we have made a donation to _________ in lieu of flowers.

Closing your Condolence note or card

Expressing Condolences via Social Media Networks
It is okay to express your condolences in a comment if the announcement has been made in a status update or blog. Take a moment to send a private note as well.

Common Errors

WordChecker
bereaved (noun): person who is grieving the loss of a loved one (adjective= “bereaved”)
grieve (verb): to feel and express sadness after the loss of a loved one (noun=”grief”)
acknowledge (verb): to express recognition or realization
deceased (noun): the person who is no longer alive(adjective=”deceased”)
pass away (verb): to die (noun=”passing”: I’m sorry to hear of his passing.)
dedicated (adjective): showing extreme care and commitment to a person or thing
to feel up to something(verb): to be feeling well enough to leave the home and do something with another person
donation (noun): a gift of money or items to a research organization or charity that helps others
in lieu of flowers: instead of buying flowers (use only if the bereaved request donations instead of flowers)

Discuss: Should you say “Time will heal” to a person who has just lost a loved one? We all know this is true, but do we want to hear this phrase when the loss and sadness is so fresh?

How to Write a Condolence Message: The Best Examples of Condolences (updated July 2022)

Writing a condolence message can be tough. What should you say? Or not say? How do you find the right words, or strike the right tone?

From “I am sorry for your loss” and “may he rest in peace” to “we’re deeply saddened” and beyond: sincere condolences are among the most difficult things to write.

Introduction: writing the perfect condolence message

Fortunately, this page will help get you started. It lists more than 100 heartfelt condolences, sympathy card ideas, and handy tips that you can use in various settings.

What to say to someone who lost someone is indeed a sensitive issue. So learning about how to write condolence message is an invaluable life skill.

Feel free to modify them as you see fit; think of the below messages as starting points, to get you thinking.

What you will learn in this article:

General condolence messages

What to say to someone who lost a family member or a dear friend? And what to write when words fall short?

The below examples of condolences are appropriate for almost all situations; the best condolence messages are at once timeless and elegant.

Condolence messages for loss of mother

What to say to someone who lost their mother? It’s a very sensitive point. The below suggestions will help you get some ideas.

Condolences for loss of father

Religious condolence messages: “May he rest in peace” and beyond

Biblical condolence messages

What does the Bible say about loss? Or about memories? What does God say about difficult times? The scriptures below will shed some light on those questions.

What a short condolence message needs to say

Short and sincere condolences are sometimes necessary in situations where space is limited, for example on a note attached to a floral bouquet.

Condolences text messages (that is, a condolences SMS) are another example of where every letter counts.

When it comes to short condolence messages like these, finding just the right word or words matters deeply.

Of course, it’s important that your words of sorrow be comforting, regardless of what words you use. Below are some examples, all of which are less than 70 characters in length.

Best sympathy quotes

Sympathy quotes by famous people will help you to craft the perfect condolences. for a friend or family member.

The below examples will help you to embrace the memories of a loved one, the moments of sadness, and the moments of joy in grief and life.

Become the reason that the person grieving can begin to smile again – be it a grief-stricken loved one, a colleague, or friend, even if they are still hurting.

You can offer them that smile right now by using the below condolence quotes for inspiration, to let them know that their loved one will never be forgotten.

The best condolences for a cat or dog (or other pet)

What to say to someone who lost a parent is one thing, but the loss of a pet can also be a very difficult thing to go through.

It can make the grieving pet owner feel lonely and disconnected.

But they are not alone on this journey – there are many other people out there who feel just like they do.

The below “loss of a pet messages” will help you show them that they are not alone in this difficult peroid. They can also be added to a memorial gift for a lost pet, if you choose to get one.

How to write sympathy card messages: sincere condolences

If you have recently lost someone close to you, or know someone that has, it is important to show them that they are not alone.

One way of doing this is by writing a sincere condolence card or message for them, for the loved one, or for their family members and friends.

1. Sympathy message writing tips

2. How to sign a (group) sympathy card

23 Sample Condolence Messages for Flowers

Grief is a process that takes time to get over, but with the support of friends and the entire family, it is possible to go through the grieving process.

If you are struggling with how to give condolences to someone who has lost a loved one, here are some messages for sympathy flowers or a sympathy gift basket that can help you say what you want in just the right way.

Feel free to combine some of the below suggestions in any way you see fit. See them as “building blocks” that you can use to compose the ideal message based on the specific situation.

Greetings:

Main text:

Closings:

Beyond “May he rest in peace”: some tips on writing personal condolences

Writing a sincere sympathy message when someone dies is never easy. Here are some tips to keep in mind for writing the most sincere condolences.

Grief quotes

We all experience loss at some point in our lives.

Whether it’s the passing of a family member, friend, or pet; breaking up with a significant other; or moving out of state to pursue your dreams – life is full of change and we must learn how to cope.

This grief guide was created for those who are experiencing grief right now and need hope, encouragement, and support during this difficult time.

The quotes below offer an idea of the thoughts and feelings that are shared by those who have experienced grief before you.

They provide insight into what someone might be feeling if they’re going through a similar experience, or they can help to put your own situation in perspective during this difficult time.

What does a meaningful sympathy message consist of?

A meaningful sympathy message is one that is heartfelt, that can succinctly express condolences for the loss of a loved one.

It is important to offer words of hope if possible and to let the grieving person or family know they are not alone.

A meaningful message of sympathy is one that is comforting and thoughtful.

It is not meant to be a long, drawn-out message or conversation, but rather a short, heartfelt message acknowledging the loss and shared grief.

A meaningful message of sympathy may be accompanied by a small gift, such as flowers or a card. It also lets the recipient know they are cared for and supported.

That you are sorry for their loss, that you are thinking of them, and that you are here for them.

Helpful links and resources for grief counseling and bereavement support

15 comforting phrases for a loved one’s passing

Sample condolences email messages, and how to write a letter of condolence

Sometimes you might want to send a slightly longer message — that is, longer than can fit in an SMS or a small card — and here both written letters and e-mail come in handy.

They are ideal for when just a few words on a sympathy card or flower card are not enough to say what you want to say.

Below are some example sentences that can be used in writing condolences email messages. They show that there are many ways to be comforting, even if words seem inadequate.

Feel free to use only the examples sentences that you feel are appropriate for your situation, and rearrange them in any way that you see fit.

Condolences gift ideas: from flower arrangements to books and baskets

We all know that sending a heartfelt condolences gift is common practice when someone is in mourning.

A sympathy card may be enough for some people, while others want something more tangible.

However, there are times when a card can’t fully express how sorry you are for someone’s loss or hardship.

Fortunately, there are also some other gifts you can send to show your heartfelt sympathy.

The evolution of condolences gifting: from cards to baskets and beyond

In the past few decades, the tradition has evolved from sending flowers and plants to sending sympathy baskets of food and other gift ideas.

Appropriate gift ideas can also include toys, books, or a charitable donation in the name of the mourning person, if you feel that’s more appropriate.

It’s also sometimes difficult to find the perfect words, so sending for example a condolence gift basket can be more fitting.

Below is some helpful information on the available options for thoughtful condolence gifts.

Sympathy cards

Cards can be sent from anyone and they’re a quick and simple form of condolence gift. Well-made cards are also a treat to behold.

They’re also the least expensive option of this list, which is especially appealing if you’re looking for an inexpensive way to say sorry for someone’s recent bereavement.

Personalized cards with a handwritten message also add a personal touch that e-mail or text messaging cannot.

Don’t forget about the small details when it comes to sending your card, as details can make all the difference.

Don’t, for example, let it get torn or mangled, and avoid coffee stains or crossed-out text.

Make it look nice, and let it show that you care.

Sending condolences flowers

These are among the most popular sympathy gifts; flowers speak for themselves.

Condolence flowers can help bring some light and color into a place where there is only darkness and sadness.

Sending flowers also represents love and heartfelt caring to those who receive them, which may bring comfort during difficult times. They are also linked in people’s minds to birthdays and anniversary celebrations, and as such carry positive associations.

When sending flowers, it is important to know what type the recipient might prefer. In brief, the best flowers for condolences are the ones that create the least inconvenience.

For example, someone who is allergic to certain types of pollen might want non-allergenic flowers such as tulips, daffodils, carnations, orchids, or roses.

Also, try to arrange with the florist that the condolences flower arrangements are easy for the recipient to receive and set up.

Think here of avoiding tedious steps to receive the flowers, and unnecessary packaging that needs to be discarded somewhere.

Because the mourning family may be quite busy with practical and logistical tasks, condolence flowers can also be sent directly for display in the service. This applies to sympathy baskets as well.

Ordering flowers: pros and cons of online vs offline

Online flower shops are convenient in that they allow you to select from a wide range of different arrangements with just the click of a button.

Offline “brick and mortar” flower shops, on the other hand, are great when you want to send something that has been hand-picked by their florist, like fresh-cut flowers that will last longer than a pre-arranged bouquet.

If you have little knowledge about what kind of flower bouquets are appreciated in certain cultures, try asking someone within the family about what they would like to see at the ceremony.

Finally, look elsewhere on this page for examples of a (short) condolences flower message that you can send along with the flowers delivery.

Again, little details make all the difference in situations like these.

Sending a condolences basket

Condolences baskets are a great choice when you want something more than flowers, but don’t want to go overboard.

A condolence gift basket can be a wonderful gesture to let someone know that you are thinking of them during their time of loss.

The gift basket does not have to be extravagant or expensive, but it should include items which will comfort the recipient or remind them of happy memories.

The basket may also include a card that may provide words of sympathy and support for the bereaved family.

A condolence gift basket is a thoughtful gesture, perfect for times when words seem insufficient.

Keep in mind that different types of baskets mean different things in different cultures, so be sure to send one with the right meaning for the occasion.

People may also send condolence food baskets that contain staple food items that the bereaved person may not have time to buy themselves.

What should I include in a condolence gift basket?

A condolence gift basket is a thoughtful gesture that can be customized to suit the needs of the bereaved person.

The basket can include items that are specific to the bereaved person’s tastes or interests, whether that be snacks or books or wine or pasta.

For example, if you know someone’s favorite type of candy or tea or wine, consider putting those in your basket.

There is no one specific item that is appropriate for every condolence gift basket, but some good examples are things like:

Extra: what does condolences mean?

A simple definition of the word “condolences” is the following:

The word “condolences” is almost always used in the plural form; the singular form “condolence” is rather rare when used as a noun.

But the singular form, “condolence,” is not rare when it is used as an adjective, for example in the phrases “condolence card” or “condolence message.”

In terms of etymology, both “condolence” and “condolences” come from the Latin condolens, which itself comes from the Latin verb condolere: “to suffer with another.”

Dolere means “to grieve”; think, for example, of the word “doleful.”

How do you spell condolences?

The headline of this section has just answered that question. It’s “condolences,” and not “condolances,” “condolinces,” or “condolonces.”

Conclusion: don’t face grief alone

Grief can be hard to navigate, but it’s not something anyone should face alone. There is comfort in knowing that people care.

The grief quotes and comforting words shared here are only some of what’s out there.

Please share these quotes, tips, and links with someone who might need them.

Further reading: short condolences, and work situations

Other posts of interest:

Photos: via DepositPhotos, Pexels, Unsplash, Canva, and Pixabay.

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