How to deal with loneliness

How to Cope With Loneliness

Elizabeth Scott, PhD is an author, workshop leader, educator, and award-winning blogger on stress management, positive psychology, relationships, and emotional wellbeing.

Amy Morin, LCSW, is the Editor-in-Chief of Verywell Mind. She’s also a psychotherapist, the author of the bestselling book «13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do,» and the host of The Verywell Mind Podcast.

If you or a loved one are struggling with a mental health condition, contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357 for information on support and treatment facilities in your area.

For more mental health resources, see our National Helpline Database.

Virtually everyone experiences loneliness from time to time. The feeling can be especially noticeable around the holidays, Valentine’s Day, and times of extreme stress.

The sheer number of adults in the United States who feel lonely is quite large—in a January 2020 survey of 10,000 adults by Cigna, 61% of those surveyed said they felt lonely. However, people don’t always talk about feelings of loneliness and don’t always know what to do with these feelings.

Other than being emotionally painful, loneliness can impact people in many ways:

How to Cope With Loneliness

If you’re experiencing loneliness, there are some things you can do about it. Below are nine strategies for dealing with loneliness.

Join a Class or Club

Whether it’s an art class, exercise class, or book club, joining a class or a club automatically exposes you to a group of people who share at least one of your interests. Check your local library or community college as well as city parks and recreation departments to see what’s available.

Joining a class or club can also provide a sense of belonging that comes with being part of a group. This can stimulate creativity, give you something to look forward to during the day, and help stave off loneliness.

Volunteer

Volunteering for a cause you believe in can provide the same benefits as taking a class or joining a club: meeting others, being part of a group, and creating new experiences. It also brings the benefits of altruism and can help you find more meaning in your life.

In addition to decreasing loneliness, this can bring greater happiness and life satisfaction. Additionally, working with those who have less than you can help you feel a deeper sense of gratitude for what you have in your own life.

Find Support Online

Because loneliness is a somewhat widespread issue, there are many people online who are looking for people to connect with. Find people with similar interests by joining Facebook or Meetup groups focused on your passions. Check to see if any apps you use, like fitness or workout apps, have a social element or discussion board to join.

You do have to be careful of who you meet over the internet (and, obviously, don’t give out any personal information like your bank account number), but you can find real support, connection, and lasting friendships from people you meet online.

A word of caution: Social media can actually increase feelings of loneliness and cause FOMO, or «fear of missing out» so be sure to check in with yourself if you’re starting to feel this way.

Strengthen Existing Relationships

You probably already have people in your life that you could get to know better or connections with family that could be deepened. If so, why not call friends more often, go out with them more, and find other ways to enjoy your existing relationships and strengthen bonds?

If you’re struggling to find the motivation to reach out to your loved ones, it might be helpful to start slowly. Come up with just one supportive friend or family member who you could imagine reaching out to. It’s also reassuring to know that strong social support is beneficial for your mental health.

Adopt a Pet

Pets, especially dogs and cats, offer so many benefits, and preventing loneliness is one of them. Rescuing a pet combines the benefits of altruism and companionship, and fights loneliness in several ways.

It can connect you with other people—walking a dog opens you up to a community of other dog-walkers, and a cute dog on a leash tends to be a people magnet. Additionally, pets provide unconditional love, which can be a great salve for loneliness.

Talk to Strangers

An easy way to find connections in everyday life is by interacting in small ways with acquaintances or strangers you encounter. In fact, research shows that doing so contributes to our social and emotional well-being. So next time you grab a cup of coffee or see your neighbor on a walk, strike up a conversation. You might just find you feel happier afterward.

Do you have a smartphone that you frequently check while out and about? Think about putting it away a bit more. Whether you’re looking up directions or checking the news while waiting in line, research suggests that technology can get in the way of social opportunities.

Practice Self-Care

When you’re feeling lonely, be sure you’re doing what you can to take care of yourself in other ways. Self-care is always a good idea, but especially when you are feeling down. Eating nutritious food, exercising, and getting enough sleep will only make you feel better in the long run. Bonus: Take a workout class or join a running club for exercise and social interaction.

Keep Busy

Distract yourself from those feelings of loneliness and make a date with yourself. Do you have a hobby you’ve always wanted to take up or a home improvement project that’s been lingering on your to-do list? Take some time to invest in yourself and your interests and keep your mind occupied in the process.

Press Play for Advice on Loneliness

Hosted by Editor-in-Chief and therapist Amy Morin, LCSW, this episode of The Verywell Mind Podcast shares ways to stay strong even if you feel lonely.

See a Therapist

Research suggests that loneliness and symptoms of depression can perpetuate each other, meaning the more lonely you are, the more depressed you feel, and vice versa.

Sometimes just “getting out there” and meeting other people isn’t enough. It’s possible to still feel lonely when you’re around them, which could actually be a sign of depression or social anxiety. If this is the case for you, it may be a good idea to seek psychotherapy to help with feelings of loneliness, especially if you also feel other symptoms of depression.

Some forms of therapy, especially cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), can help you to change your thoughts as well as your actions to help you not only experience less loneliness but have more tools to prevent it. Whatever you do to combat loneliness, know that you are truly not alone, and there are many things you can do to feel more connected.

How to Deal With Loneliness

This article was co-authored by Chloe Carmichael, PhD. Chloe Carmichael, PhD is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist who runs a private practice in New York City. With over a decade of psychological consulting experience, Dr. Chloe specializes in relationship issues, stress management, self esteem, and career coaching. She has also instructed undergraduate courses at Long Island University and has served as adjunct faculty at the City University of New York. Dr. Chloe completed her PhD in Clinical Psychology at Long Island University in Brooklyn, New York and her clinical training at Lenox Hill Hospital and Kings County Hospital. She is accredited by the American Psychological Association and is the author of “Nervous Energy: Harness the Power of Your Anxiety” and “Dr. Chloe’s 10 Commandments of Dating.”

There are 9 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.

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People feel lonely for a number of reasons, including simple social awkwardness and intentional isolation. Some people may even feel lonely when they are surrounded by people because they lack meaningful connections with those people. [1] X Research source Everyone experiences loneliness sometimes, but it is never pleasant. Dealing with loneliness can take many forms, including meeting new people, learning to appreciate your alone time, and reconnecting with your family. Keep reading to learn more about how to deal with loneliness.

How To Deal With Loneliness: 7 Tips To Try

Have you ever felt all alone in the world? We all experience loneliness and it isn’t easy. When you’re going through a difficult time and feel there’s no one to turn to for support, it’s hard to figure out healthy coping and improve your mood and help your mind. But those who are feeling isolated or alone should know there are always people who care about their wellbeing. Learning to address your feeling of loneliness can also be a step in helping you address other mental health issues that you may be facing. The United States is facing a big problem surrounding isolation, loneliness, and related challenges. One study found that out of young people in the United States, 25% don’t have any friends they confide in. This is a problem that needs to be addressed to help the mental health of the country. Online therapy is there to help, providing convenient, affordable, and discreet access to a licensed therapist where you can see the benefits of different types of therapies from the comfort of your home.

How Do I Cope?

Humans are social creatures by nature and in our lives. You long to connect with others and you want to be loved, of course. It’s normal to want to have someone you can love in return, even if it eventually ends in divorce, the risk is worth it. Learning about dealing with feeling lonely isn’t simple, but there’s much you can do that can regain that feeling of value and belonging. There are effective ways you can cope with loneliness, and professional treatment is available if you’re in need. This article will cover tools for coping with, and moving past this feeling.

First, it’s important to note that even if you feel lonely right now, you’re not alone. Millions of people are going through similar struggles. It’s estimated that nearly 40% of all Americans feel «serious loneliness» — and Covid-19 has likely increased those feelings for many. Even those who appear connected and popular can feel isolated from others.

Managing It

Many people successfully overcome feelings of loneliness through therapy, and those who have signed up for online therapy at BetterHelp find it a valuable resource for combating the symptoms that come with feeling lonely. These therapy sessions help people change the way they look at the world, and open up to new possibilities. Some may also benefit from antidepressant drugs prescribed by a doctor to treat associated depression issues so they can take control of the changes they want to make in their life. Regardless of whether or not you’re a good candidate for medication, or what mode of therapy works best for you, it’s important to seek treatment when you’re feeling down. You’re not alone in this fight.

People sometimes ask these questions about loneliness:

What is the main cause?

Loneliness commonly stems from limited social interaction with others like events or activities or lack of emotional intimacy in one’s relationships. There are various reasons that a person may experience feelings of loneliness, from the loss of a significant relationship or moving to a new area to living with a physical or mental health condition that presents barriers to forming or maintaining social connections. Some individuals may feel lonely even when surrounded by other people, due to feeling unable to be seen as their authentic selves. These same individuals end up feeling sad, depressed, and worthless when they have either been rejected or forgotten by those they know or their families and uncared for by new people.

Is there a cure?

There is no simple answer for how to cure loneliness. Feeling lonely is a universal human emotion, therefore it’s unlikely that one will stop feeling lonely indefinitely. However, there are strategies that can help an individual to increase their feelings of social connectedness so they can stop feeling anxious about these feelings. Establishing meaningful relationships can help to prevent the harmful effects on mental and physical health that may be linked to chronic loneliness. Some of which include feeling hopeless, helpless, worthless, invisible, or uncared for/unloved when they may just be misunderstood.

How do you fight it?

Strategies that may help an individual overcome loneliness include;

If feelings of loneliness are severe and causing significant distress, reach out for further support from health care providers or mental health professionals. Through mental health treatment, adults can explore the truth behind what may be contributing to loneliness, develop strategies for coping with these feelings and take steps to build the meaningful connections they desire. Say you are a woman who turns to alcohol when you are lonely, online therapy can help you find better ways to cope with isolating events such as a pandemic or illness and other things that leave one feeling alone.

For additional resources on overcoming loneliness and social isolation, click here.

The 7 Tips for Navigating Loneliness

Below we’re suggesting seven methods of dealing with feeling lonely, all of which will be helpful in their own ways. Consider which methods might be most useful to you.

So if you’re looking for an answer on coping with this loneliness in your own life, just realize there are millions of others feeling the same way. This normal emotion is one that almost everyone experiences at some point, and it’s something that you can overcome.

Can I Manage Loneliness and Depression?

Lastly, loneliness can affect your mental health. As it increases, so does depression. One of the main signs of depression is no longer wanting to do things you used to enjoy, including spending time with your friends. If you think your feelings of loneliness may be a small part of a bigger problem, you should consider seeking support from your doctor or a mental health professional. They can help you to explore treatment options, identify local treatment facilities, and determine the next steps to take.

3. Seek Professional Help. Meeting with a mental health professional is one of the most helpful steps you can take in overcoming loneliness and the underlying issues that may be there. A therapist can help you explore the factors behind your feelings. Other issues surrounding your emotions can be addressed in treatment as well. For example, if you’ve recently lost a family member or close friend, you may be experiencing both loneliness and grief. Having an experienced professional support you through the healing process can make all the difference.

Sometimes, you might even feel lonely because of your location. Military members who are deployed or spouses who are separated from family and friends often experience a sense of loneliness that seems unsolvable. You may struggle with meeting new people. If you are in an area where you have few resources and treatment facilities, seeking professional help might seem impossible. It can be the same for those suffering from depression. In situations like this, a program like BetterHelp can be beneficial. BetterHelp is unique because counseling takes place through an online platform that you can access from any place you feel comfortable. And many people find the BetterHelp program a lot more convenient and affordable than in-person counseling.

Make an effort towards catching these thoughts and replace them with a positive message instead. The process of positive self-talk takes practice, but it can be part of a simple cure for loneliness. If you decide to seek out online therapy, then you’ll learn all about these positive self-talk techniques. It’s a good way for combating negative feelings and it can significantly improve your life.

What Hobbies Will Help You To Manage Your Emotions?

Hobbies that you do by yourself can still be fun, but attempt ones that get you out more. You might love watching movies or playing video games alone, but sometimes this isn’t the right answer when dealing with feeling lonely. Do your best with picking out some fun new hobbies that will place you in social situations. It could wind up being the push that you need to improve your social life and it can be a cure for loneliness.

Another great thing about volunteering is the people you meet are likely to share your interests. For example, if you love animals, you might consider volunteering at a local shelter. This is a place where you’re sure to meet other dog or cat people that you can connect with. It’ll be much easier to connect if you’re with others who like the same things you do. Not sure where to start? Ask around locally or use an online platform like Create the Good or Volunteer Match.

What are Other Options for Dealing with Loneliness?

Outside of the ideas above, if you’re struggling with feeling lonely and don’t have friends and family that you can connect with, you may benefit from joining a support group.

Using BetterHelp To Make A Difference

Signing up for online therapy at BetterHelp is something that can make a difference in your life. Signup is easy, and the matching process is personalized so that you’re paired with the perfect counselor for you. Depending on when you sign up, you might qualify for a free trial that will help you decide if counseling can help you cope with your loneliness. These professionals understand what you’re going through and can teach you the best coping methods, even if your loneliness stems from serious life events such as being abused.

It is in your power to reach out to an online therapist today without even having to leave your house if you are looking for anything along the lines of mental health resources or support. These therapists are available to speak to you at any time and there are many different therapy options available, all of which are within your rights no matter what you are going through. Don’t wait to contact a therapist if you’re in need. These compassionate professionals will be happy to help you with your loneliness and any other struggles you might be going through. For additional information, hundreds of articles on our company services, the eduction level of our therapists (some of which have a phd), and videos visit BetterHelp.com or follow us on social media apps for relevant news. Take a look at some BetterHelp counselor reviews from our page to see feedback (without a survey) on how they have helped others in your situation.

BetterHelp Counselor Reviews

«Peter is very caring. He is a good listener and gives me good tools to deal with my problems. I feel supported and less alone. I highly recommend him as a counselor. He has helped me through very difficult times.»

«I have a lot of high stressors happening in my life right now, it has been extremely beneficial to have someone from the outside looking in to help me see what I do not and be able to have someone helping guide me through it. I appreciate being able to have a constant conversation and send a message when it is most convenient. I have a busy life right now and knowing I have someone to talk too (if I need too) every day has made me feel less alone and capable of achieving my goals.»

Conclusion On This Topic

If you try these tips and are still having trouble overcoming your loneliness or struggling with your mental health, seek the advice of a trusted friend or family member. Using your voice to ask for the things you need can help you moved past these temporary feelings and into the life you deserve. Loneliness does not have to be a permanent feeling. You can get help and move on to happier days.

Don’t hesitate to reach out to an online therapist if you’re in need. They’ll be happy to assist you and you’ll always have someone to turn to when you’re feeling blue. The biggest mistake that you could make is to assume that you need to face this battle alone. There are always going to be people who want to help. And if you feel lonely and have thoughts of suicide seek help immediately. There are national helplines and content out there like the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline you can call at 1-800-273-8255 or you can go directly to an emergency room.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ’s)

Does feeling lonely affect you?

You could feel lonely in a crowd once in a while if you are not comfortable in that setting. You may also end up feeling misunderstood or, when surrounded by many people, feeling like you are still alone. Once you realize that being lonely is affecting you, one thing you can do is seek the help of your support system. Another great resource of having someone is online therapy and a mental health professional like a therapist.

Can you overcome being lonely if you have social anxiety?

Loneliness and social anxiety can go together because if you’re anxious about being around others, you’re most likely avoiding social situations or gatherings, which can heighten these emotions. If you feel like you’re experiencing social anxiety, that can be linked to this feeling of being lonely, and a therapist who can help you work through it.

How do you fight isolation?

There are many different causes including things like abuse and mental health challenges like depression or substance abuse disorder. It may also be something like you’ve recently moved and are in a place where you don’t know anyone. Figuring out why you’re feeling isolated is the first step.

If you’re feeling isolated because you don’t know anyone, look for activity groups to join or do your best to start spending time with people you love.

If you’re struggling from isolation and you aren’t sure why, remember that there are licensed professionals who can provide help in this area. A doctor can talk about your health information and see if it could be stemming from anything that medication could help. Talking to a therapist can help you discover other areas of your life and whether this lonely feeling is a mental health disorder or comes from specific behaviors in your life.

Contact BetterHelp

For more information on where you can find a therapist that can help, you can reach out to contact@betterhelp.com. You can also find us on LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, & YouTube.

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How to deal with loneliness: 11 key coping strategies

When approaching how to deal with loneliness, we need to start with a definition of being lonely. While there’s no universally agreed definition, Wikipedia is a good start:

«Loneliness is an unpleasant emotional response to perceived isolation. Loneliness is also described as social pain—a psychological mechanism which motivates individuals to seek social connections. It is often associated with an unwanted lack of connection and intimacy.”

It’s important to differentiate it from solitude, or ‘going solo’, which are voluntary conditions. Loneliness is the negative emotion we experience when we’re getting less social connection than we want or need.

It’s also common between all of us; something everyone feels at some point, like hunger or thirst, and we can usually fix it by seeking social connection.

Do loneliness statistics show that loneliness is on the rise?

It’s complicated, actually.

The economic effects of loneliness are pretty difficult to measure. We know they’re significant; the phrases ‘epidemic’ and ‘public health emergency’ are frequently used to describe it. But defining exactly what loneliness is, investigating sequelae (the health effects it causes), and ascribing dollar values to it is quite a challenge.

A meta-analysis (study of studies) published in the journal Social Psychiatry and Psychiatric Epidemiology reviewed 12 different studies on economic costs associated with loneliness and social isolation, and found that there’s more work to be done in figuring out the truth:

«The paucity of evidence that is available primarily evaluating the economic costs of loneliness indicates that more research is needed to assess the economic burden and identify cost-effective interventions to prevent or address loneliness and social isolation.”

As for 2020 and the age of social distancing, the answer isn’t as clear-cut as you might expect.

Kasley Killam reports in Scientific American:

“According to several recent studies, loneliness has not only leveled out but, in certain cases, actually improved. Social distancing has made us recognize the importance of our relationships, which influence health and mortality as much as factors such as smoking and excessive drinking.”

One of the main problems is defining what counts as loneliness. Are you lonely because you haven’t been able to meet your friends at the bar much in 2020? Or are you just missing the beer?

How long do you have to go without human contact to be defined as lonely? And what medical conditions are definitely caused by loneliness? There doesn’t seem to be conclusive answers to these yet, but we can learn a lot from individual perceptions shared via surveys.

What is the main cause of loneliness, and what is the loneliest age group?

Some of the other more notable causes of loneliness include new schools, new cities, new jobs, new relationships, etc. Working from home is a potential cause of loneliness, and that’s going to need increasing research as some companies shift to hybrid models (some on-premise work, some remote work). One of the core managerial skills of the next five years is going to be team development across distributed teams, and “team development” in that context will mean fostering connections between teammates and helping employees on how to deal with loneliness.

As for the loneliest generation, because that is a question people ask, the World Economic Forum answer seems to be millennials. A recent YouGov poll found 30% of millennial respondents “always or often feel lonely,” compared with 20% of Generation X and 15% of Baby Boomers.

Can loneliness change your personality?

This is important to know, because it actually is possible for loneliness to shape your personality, much as it’s possible for your personality to affect the likelihood that you’ll feel lonely.

This is based on research from Marcus Mund and Franz Neyer at the Institute of Psychology at Friedrich Schiller University, Jena in Germany, who measured the personality traits, loneliness and subjective health of 661 healthy young adults (average age 24) in 1995 and then tracked down 271 of them in 2010 and asked them the same questions (by which time the average age of the sample was 40). To measure subjective health, participants simply responded to the question “How is your health in general?” on a 5-point scale from “very good” to “bad”.

Ultimately, the personality measures taken in the participants’ youth correlated with their health and loneliness scores in mid-life; also the loneliness and health measures in youth correlated with personality in mid-life.

It’s an interesting two-way dynamic. If you are already feeling lonely, and as a result you don’t attempt to go out and interact with people and try new things, your personality can become increasingly isolationist, which will lead you to feel more lonely. It’s a bad circle to get caught in.

We have some strategies for combating loneliness further down in this article, but it should be noted that a lot of research on overcoming loneliness is tied to work and having a job, because it’s one key source of human interaction. Now, obviously in 2020 that was very different for a chunk of the working world, and the models we’re seeing going forward may have less human interaction as well. So it’s not the perfect solution, but it’s certainly one approach.

Is it bad to be alone all the time?

It’s not necessarily good to be alone all the time, no. But some people are natural introverts, or don’t need the energy of other people to thrive day-in and day-out.

You can still be quiet and still and consumed by self-driven activities, but you should try to be with others some of the time. Even if you find that exhausting, being with others can expose you to different attitudes and perspectives and ways of thinking which can be beneficial to your own belief structure.

How to not feel lonely and how to cope with loneliness

We will keep talking about personal implications of loneliness for a second, then shift to professional implications. In your personal life, here are some approaches around how to not feel lonely:

These are some of the personal approaches on how to deal with loneliness. Now, because work is a big chunk of many people’s lives, we need to turn to the professional implications of loneliness as well. There’s obviously some overlap.

How to combat loneliness: Employees want more connection in their jobs

An employee outlook survey was performed by the UK’s Chartered Institute for Professional Development. It investigated the cultures and structures of businesses that the 2226 respondents were employed by.

55% of respondents said they’d prefer to work in a company that had a ‘family feel’, but only 25% of them said they currently work at one that fits that description.

While the survey was conducted in 2015, it’d be interesting to see how opinions change in the post-COVID world, with increasing remote work and employment disruption seen across the globe.

Why am I so lonely? It might be because many remote workers struggle with loneliness.

All-remote SaaS company Buffer were one of the pioneers of remote work. Working with a globally distributed team, they’ve done some significant research into remote work culture, culminating in 2020’s State of Remote Work report. Data was taken from a survey of over 3,500 remote workers around the world in early 2020 (prior to the pandemic).

The survey found that 20% of respondents name loneliness as their biggest struggle with working remotely.

But the analysis wisely identifies the fact that while remote work is linked to loneliness, it doesn’t necessarily cause loneliness:

«Remote workers feeling lonely is also an accurate reflection of a larger-scale societal struggle with loneliness. In the U.S., loneliness has been labeled an epidemic. In the U.K., almost one-fifth of the population has reported that they are “always or often lonely.”

According to the Remote Work 2020 report by Remote.tools, which surveyed 331 remote workers from various distributed companies, 27% of remote workers are unable to separate work from their personal life, leading to a further deterioration of mental health.

When your work isn’t specific to a location, it can give a great sense of freedom. But the downside is losing out on that psychological barrier between work life and home life. If you’re answering work emails late at night from your bed, boundaries have been crossed in an unhealthy way.

What can loneliness do to a person?

Knock-on effects from workplace isolation can have significant effects on your mental health.

Loneliness statistics have revealed that loneliness can increase the amount of cortisol (often known as the stress hormone) circulating through the body, putting stress on the immune system and increasing the risk of a range of illnesses.

A meta-analysis published in the International Journal of Social Psychiatry studied 88 different studies on the topic and found that loneliness has «a moderately significant effect on depression”. That’s about as strong a link as you could ask for, given that both loneliness and depression are complex conditions with lots of variables affecting them.

And as published in the Journal of Clinical & Diagnostic Research, loneliness is something we should all be wary of: «Loneliness is a common experience with 80% of the population below 18 years of age and 40% above 65 years of age report loneliness at least sometimes in their life.”

How to combat loneliness, simple terms: Be employed and work hard

Two findings from the Loneliness and the Workplace 2020 US Report by Cigna show the links between being out of work and feelings of loneliness.

They polled 10,441 adults in the United States, investigating their feelings on the UCLA Loneliness Scale. Results on this scale range from 20 (not lonely) to 80 (very lonely).

(Remember there are other socioeconomic consequences of not having enough work; not just a reduced opportunity for meeting new friends and connections through the work itself, but having less disposable income to spend on social activities outside of work.)

Increased remote work may shift the causes of loneliness

Three telling statistics were revealed in Perkbox’s 2020 UK workplace stress survey:

«Work-related office politics’ (37%) are the most common cause of work-related stress, followed by ‘lack of interdepartmental communications’ (34%), and ‘the work performance of others’ (33%).”

Changing from office-based work to remote work will disrupt each of these:

Does this mean working from home will cause a reduction in work-related stress? Possibly, but it’s complicated. While these will contribute to a less stressful working life (along with the absence of unpleasant commutes), other factors will have the opposite effect: taking care of children at home, lack of work-life boundaries, precarious economic conditions, and increased loneliness.

How to deal with loneliness: The bottom line

As with anything, you need to work at it when considering how to deal with loneliness and why you yourself might be so lonely.

First: consider your feelings and background and what drives your feelings of loneliness. Do you feel like you need more friends? More hobbies? More plans? More channels to meet people? Better relationships with co-workers? Make a list of the inputs to your loneliness as a first step in how to deal with loneliness.

Second: create a plan. What activities could you join? Who could you reach out to? Could you organize something with co-workers, even if over video? Could you create a book club at work, or something similar? Could you join a sports league? There will be some fear in this stage, especially if you have lower self-esteem and feelings of inadequacy, But you need to push through as best as you can.

Third: be consistent. The more consistently you can enact processes and actions and plans, the better you will start to feel in the context of how to deal with loneliness. You may even feel like you’re surrounded by people eventually! That’s a beautiful transition.

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How to Deal with Loneliness: 5 Ways to Stop Feeling Lonely

Loneliness is not an abstract condition that affects only certain kinds of people. The truth is that feelings of loneliness can affect anyone—young, old, and in-between—and at any point in life.

It’s not uncommon for the elderly, people going through a breakup, divorce, or death of a loved one, and young people to struggle with loneliness. A loneliness survey by Cigna indicates that Generation Z adults (ages 18-22), in fact, are feeling lonelier than almost any other population. 1

Loneliness can be due to so many different factors, and can affect both your emotional and physical health long-term. If you want to know what to do when you feel lonely, consider these 5 tips:

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings of Loneliness

A first step to overcoming loneliness is realizing how you feel and the impact it’s having on your life. Try talking to a counselor or therapist. They can help you work through the factors that may be contributing to it, suggest additional steps to combat loneliness, alternative therapies, and help you build coping skills that work for you.

2. Know When to Engage or Disengage From the Online World

The online world can be a double-edged sword, especially when it comes to loneliness and social isolation. Log on or log off—which is healthier? It all depends.

3. Find a Volunteer Opportunity as a Way to Feel Less Lonely

Try one of these ideas if volunteering appeals to you:

Whenever possible look to your local neighborhood or community for volunteer activities. This way you can make friends and forge social ties with others in close proximity to you. Chances are good that you’ll run into them in the grocery store, at your church or synagogue, at the coffee shop or local restaurant—providing additional opportunities for social interaction and helping you to feel less lonely.

4. Join a Group or Club to Overcome Loneliness With In-Person Connections

Depending on where you live, you may have access to various types of groups and club activities often founded on common interests and hobbies. You can find many of these types of groups online or through community resources.

Meetup is an online platform through which you can find a group or create your own based on a particular interest. Groups meet in person, locally. There are Meetup groups for all types of interests, including food, travel, lifestyle, entertainment, sports, recreation, culture, and much more. Meetup groups are available throughout the country and can give you things to do when you feel lonely. It’s a great way to make friends and get together with likeminded people on a regular basis.

5. Practice Self-Care

Besides working to connect with others, don’t overlook the potential power of exercise, healthy food, proper sleep, sunshine, and even meditation for fighting loneliness.

Loneliness affects millions of people. There are many things you can do when trying to overcome it. The key is realizing how you feel and finding the best strategy for you.