What you say when you talk to yourself
What you say when you talk to yourself
What you say when you talk to yourself
Что говорить, когда разговариваешь с собой. Запрограммируй свой мозг на успех!
WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU TALK TO YOURSELF
Печатается с разрешения Shad Helmstetter. Все права защищены. Никакая часть данной книги не может быть воспроизведена в какой бы то ни было форме без письменного разрешения владельцев авторских прав.
© 1986, 2017 by Shad Helmstetter
© Харханов Е., перевод на русский язык, 2017
© ООО «Издательство АСТ», 2018
Самое простое, энергичное и убедительное исследование невероятных возможностей нашего мозга. Все, что вам нужно, чтобы начать думать, говорить и жить по-новому.
Эта книга – захватывающий рассказ о работе и возможностях мозга. Она учит нас «разговаривать» с мозгом так, чтобы достичь самореализации и успеха. Книгу стоит прочесть, а навыки, безусловно, стоит освоить.
Сейчас много пишут и говорят об открытиях в нейрофизиологии, но мало кто показывает, как использовать эти знания в обычной жизни. Браво!
Именно эта книга открыла мне глаза. Теперь я точно знаю, почему почти все советы из серии «как добиться успеха» не работают. Изучайте свой мозг, играйте по его правилам, и только тогда вы получите результат.
Предисловие к новому изданию
Недавние открытия в области нейробиологии, послужившие основой для первого издания этой книги, со временем распространились – а если говорить точнее, прорвались – во все сферы нашей жизни. Концепция позитивного внутреннего диалога лишь вначале являлась вспомогательным инструментом личностного роста, но в итоге разрослась до глобального представления о роли разума в поведении человека и его влиянии на судьбу.
В настоящее время уже ни для кого не секрет, что наш мозг в буквальном смысле запрограммирован на успех или поражение, и нам ничего не остается, кроме как воплощать эти программы в жизнь без оглядки на обстоятельства. Однако некоторые люди упорно стараются освободиться от старых негативных программ, которые тянут их назад, но не всегда знают, как справиться с ними.
Нейробиологические исследования показали нам, как осуществляется программирование мозга. И теперь всем хочется понять, как можно использовать полученные знания, чтобы изменить эти программы и улучшить свою жизнь.
Настоящее издание, несомненно, поможет вам в этом. В нем перечислены все возможности позитивного внутреннего диалога, описан процесс программирования нашего мозга, а также дано объяснение того, как пользоваться этими инструментами, чтобы добиться выдающихся успехов.
На страницах этой книги я время от времени буду так или иначе заострять ваше внимание на наиболее важных моментах, которые непременно стоит запомнить. Таким образом мы будем использовать свойство нейропластичности, которое продемонстрировало, что наш мозг быстрее и надежнее усваивает новую информацию через повторение. Когда вы замечаете, что какая-то мысль повторяется несколько раз, это помогает вам запомнить ее, и она на подсознательном уровне откладывается в вашей памяти.
Представляя вам это новое издание, я также хотел бы воспользоваться возможностью и поблагодарить моих верных читателей по всему миру, которые прочли эту книгу на разных языках и затем превратили позитивный внутренний диалог в часть своей повседневной жизни. Ведь часто то, что считалось волшебством еще вчера, становится наукой сегодня. Так и недавнее «чудо внутреннего диалога», благодаря последним научным открытиям, начинает превращаться в новый прогрессивный образ жизни.
Д-р Шад Хелстеттер
Ищем правильный путь
Внутри вас есть все, что существует вокруг.
Ваши мысли материализуются, ваши мечты сбываются.
У вас изначально есть все, что вы захотите.
Ваши возможности так же безграничны, как наша бесконечная Вселенная.
Жизнь многих из нас могла бы быть гораздо приятнее. Все мы слышали, что жизнь должна приносить нам новые возможности, исполнение желаний, успех и радость, наполняющие каждый прожитый день. Большинство из нас мечтает как минимум иметь достойную работу, построить успешную карьеру, создать крепкую семью и достичь финансового благополучия. Это то, чего мы ожидаем от жизни. В глубине души мы уверены, что полностью заслужили это счастье и, несомненно, имеем право получить его.
Но задумывались ли вы когда-нибудь, почему не всё у нас происходит так, как должно? Почему мы не получаем от жизни все, чего хотим и что, по идее, должны иметь? Отчего везение приходит только к ничтожному меньшинству и отворачивается от остальных?
Почему лишь некоторые из нас раз за разом оказываются более успешными, удачливыми и счастливыми, чем остальные? В чем здесь разница? Может быть, это карма, таинственным образом определяющая нашу судьбу и не оставляющая нам никакого права самим выбирать свой путь?
Так можем ли мы сами контролировать свою жизнь? И если да, как, по идее, и должно быть, то что идет не так? Что не дает нам двигаться вперед? Если мы действительно хотим добиться большего, осуществить все свои желания и достичь успеха во всех сферах жизни, то какое препятствие мешает нам в этом?
Безграничные возможности для применения на практике
Представьте себе, что вашу жизнь не портят те или иные повседневные бытовые хлопоты, она наполнена радостью от успешно выполненных задач и удовлетворением от ежедневной реализации ваших возможностей. Лично для меня все это долгое время казалось неосуществимой мечтой, этаким сундуком с волшебными сказками. Жизнь, полная сбывшихся надежд и заслуженного успеха, встречалась мне лишь на страницах приключенческих романов.
В детстве я обладал бурным воображением. Еще задолго до того, как узнал, что не все в наших силах, я мечтал делать то, на что человек, по моему мнению, точно был способен. Помню, еще мальчишкой я лежал на мягкой траве и смотрел в вечернее небо. Моя душа устремлялась ввысь, к кристально чистым звездам, усыпавшим небесный свод. Мне казалось, что я способен дотянуться до этих звезд и потрогать их. Я мог вообразить себе любую мечту и претворить ее в жизнь.
Шли годы, и мои грезы уступили место более практичным вещам. Усыпанные звездами небеса, трава, мокрая от росы, и сказочные миры заменились более рациональными задачами. Как только я пошел в школу и стал серьезно заниматься, мне начало открываться все то, что было не в наших силах. Неудивительно, что при этом границы человеческих возможностей я изучил гораздо лучше, чем необъятный потенциал нашего разума.
Мне объясняли, что можно, а что нельзя. Я хорошо усвоил, что витать в облаках плохо, а быть реалистом – наоборот, очень хорошо. В итоге, я выкинул из головы все космические фантазии, что будоражили меня прежде, и, приняв законы жизни, занялся решением более насущной задачи – как выжить в этом безумном мире. Время от времени меня терзали сомнения, что здесь все не так просто, как казалось на первый взгляд, но тогда я еще не мог понять, в чем подвох.
Прошло много лет, и однажды я решил, что пришло время остановиться и вновь взглянуть на звезды. Это было непросто, но мне удалось побороть себя. В итоге, результат этого вроде бы ничего не значащего решения изменил всю мою жизнь и задал ей совершенно другое направление.
What to Say When You Talk to Yourself PDF Summary
12min Team | Posted on December 5, 2018 |
Well, this is not a problem Shad is addressing but an everyday reality.
Either consciously or unconsciously we all indulge in self-chat and puzzle over a wide variety of things in our moments of wasted time.
This book tries to ascertain the real prowess of this phenomenon and how we can capitalize on it.
Who Should Read “What to Say When You Talk to Yourself”? And Why?
If you prefer to play on the safe side, you are probably inclined to agree that a daily dose of motivation is all it takes to come out victorious. But, why then so few people manage to break the ice?
Only those whose lives are perfectly aligned with their inner needs can be exempted from reading this amazing masterpiece.
To put it differently, we believe that flipping through the pages of “ What to Say When You Talk to Yourself ” would be beneficial.
About Shad Helmstetter
Shad Helmstetter is a renowned author and a self-development figure whose methods are unconventional.
A life-coach, who explains the mind-programming in need of a complete overhaul.
“What to Say When You Talk to Yourself PDF Summary”
Chapters 1-5 — Setting Up a Plan
Frequently, we have been told that we can achieve anything we crave for if we put up the necessary effort. Nonetheless, in practicality, the people sharing these tips don’t have the credibility since no one has rolled out the red carpet before them.
In all honesty, they love the glamour and limelight as much as the next person. Why then we fail in reaching our goals, or making things work the way we want it to be?
The everyday life which takes most of our energy and engrossed us entirely is the biggest bottleneck one can come across against.
The answer to this struggle is almost always right underneath your nose, but we tend to overshoot the destination. After being engaged in constant learning, you’ll find out the unvarnished truth regarding the process of exceeding your expectations.
Shad talks about his path to becoming a real goal-setter and achiever.
Are you ready for the bitter truth?
Top-notch behavioral analyzers and researchers have uncovered that the lion’s share (70%) of the inner phenomena is comprised of negative sensations. To spice things up, it’s also brought to light by doctors alike that most of the illnesses are self-induced.
Wow, that’s a revelation!
Since the old programming of the mind is the “engine” which controls and cultivates the habits, you should zoom in on the practices you apply to your life.
The author ponders about the probability of maintaining high-intensity which could lead to full reformation, inwardly. So why then, we fail to establish good habits, even though we’ve read dozens of self-help books and exerted ourselves in following those ground rules?
A general rule of thumb is that self-improvement is an endless process, not an overnight sensation.
It stands to reason why most people just go back to their previous lifestyle and abandon the idea of alteration.
To make up for this loss, Shad pinpoints three key elements omitted from self-development literature:
Chapters 6-10 – Self Management
Can we find a single soul on this planet who doesn’t indulge in self-talk? Well, that’s on the same wavelength as saying – let’s find a person who doesn’t need oxygen. The emotional expression can either be put into words, pictures, thoughts and we all one way or the other rely upon the mind to make decisions.
So, the answer to that question is – No!
With that being said – a thought doesn’t have any real power until you pour belief into it. In other words, ideas and concepts mean nothing without the person to inflict judgment and ruminate on something.
Years and years of researching and exploring have led the author into noticing that most of the self-talk falls into the unconscious realm. It means that people do it out of habit, and are not keenly aware of the sensations that emerge.
If you go back a little bit and reminisce about the dreams that you once had and the craftiness you possessed but didn’t follow that intuition – you’ll find out that most of the self-talk is negative.
You could have turned them into a real-life experience, but something insurmountable cropped up!
THE FIVE STEPS THAT CONTROL OUR SUCCESS OR FAILURE
How can we define Self-Talk?
Self-Talk is a way to override our past negative programming by erasing or replacing it with conscious, positive new directions.
The Five Levels of Self-Talk
In the last chapter, the author focuses on the pros and cons of the positive-thinking rhetoric. As a rarely criticized concept, the author is curious regarding its practical nature.
Is it just a good theory, or is it applicable in day-to-day encounters?
Shad cast doubt on the idea of developing a mindset which can subdue the urge to produce negative thoughts – forever. For precise the same reason, leaning on the notion of developing into a positive-thinker is short-lived.
The human mind wants ACTIONS, WORDS, COMMANDS, not some commercialized belief-system that a large chunk of the population nurtures.
Chapters 11-15 – New Attitude
Shad starts by attempting to unpuzzle the myth of motivation. He makes it crystal clear that there are different kinds of motivations and motivators most of whom have an audience of anxious listeners whose life has turned upside down, and he/she is ready to wave its wand and make all the sorrow disappear.
It’s all done energetically so that once a person leaves that collective magnetism would feel psyched up to beat the odds! Even companies endorse the same attitude when trying to motivate their colleagues and conclude businesses.
EXTERNAL MOTIVATION IS TEMPORARY!
If you don’t want to be led astray and want to avoid veering off course, then you have to understand that you need an internal shift.
Corporate executives and managers should heed these warning indicators. If at some point, you felt like your motivational speech didn’t have the effect you were hoping for, you should understand that external motivation is not linked to permanency.
Many people confuse this part with hypnosis. Although they pretty much share the same features, hypnosis helps you enter a “trance” state, while Self-Talk guides you through the process of achieving your goals, consciously.
When it comes to practical use, you should know that an overly complex system that requires much time, energy will never be put into use!
Advocate for simplicity, and you’ll immediately see the positive change. Also, it is critical to understand the possibilities regarding self-talk:
Chapters 16-20 – Lean towards Problem-Solving
Self-Talk can be further subdivided into four categories:
State your goal in the present tense and remain persistent! The subconscious mind is not sure whether your statement is true or false, therefore, you should always insist on telling it to act upon that energy.
I always do everything I need to do when I need to do it. I never argue or let my emotions work against me. I don’t smoke! I have a good memory.
I easily and automatically remember any name or anything that is important to me. I eat only what I should.
I am a good listener-I hear everything that is I am attentive, interested, and aware of everything that is going on around me.
Try to get as specific as possible, and that will help you change your attitude. Your attitude will determine the outcome; it’s that simple. You should also bear in mind that attitude has a critical role in the portrayal of yourself!
As we progress throughout this book, you also start to get the big picture and act upon given instructions. This is the essence of problem solving and accomplishment.
Also, don’t misuse the term “goal” and try to be as consistent as possible. Once your projections are in tune with the reality, it will be easier to conquer the world.
Chapters 21-23 – Self-talk and Its Effects
The last three chapters revolve around the idea of spearheading a campaign that will enable you to create your own self-talk.
Emphasize honesty and try not to embellish your daily encounters. Keep it real and loud by knowing your current standings.
Example: Today has been a tough day.
We also advise you to run through the Self-Talk checklist to see whether you are moving in the right direction:
The author highlights the following statement:
You are everything there is,
Your thoughts, your life, your dreams come true.
You are everything you choose to be.
You are unlimited as the endless universe.
Key Lessons from “What to Say When You Talk to Yourself”
1. The truth behind “I can do it” mentality
2. Find out what really works
3. Educate yourself and dive deep into your unconscious tendencies
The truth behind “I can do it” mentality
Ask yourself, can a 75 year-old-man from Texas beat Usain Bolt in 100-meters race? Don’t care who your motivational speaker is, the truth is that not everything is possible.
Genetics, culture, environment, financial and physical capabilities – all of these can affect the outcome.
Make smart moves, and you can end up exceeding your expectations.
But believing that a 45-year-old dude who has never been a basketball player, can defeat Lebron James in one-on-one game is crazy.
Find out what really works
Shad merely implies that an internal shift is 100x more powerful than millions of external motivational boosts.
They wield no real power, and you should not lean on them for overcoming temporary setbacks.
Educate yourself and dive deep into your unconscious tendencies
Read, ponder, and puzzle over concepts engrained deep inside you.
Don’t allow your shallowness to stand in the way of full victory in terms of achieving your goals.
That is the essence of prosperity.
“What to Say When You Talk to Yourself Quotes”
Our Critical Review
Well, it is good to something that questions the concepts which are overly commercialized – such as a positive mindset.
It’s of enormous importance to have someone who fears not in letting the cat out of the bag!
Shad Helmstetter gives us the lowdown on how self-talk affects our decision-making, and how we can make use of it!
Learn more and more, in the speed that the world demands.
What to Say When You Talk to Yourself
Get A Copy
Friend Reviews
Reader Q&A
Lists with This Book
Community Reviews
I love this book. It helped change my live for the better. It says, that the average 18 year old hears, «no,» «you can’t do it,» «your not good enough,» and the like 148,000 times. I was especially rotten as a youth, I must have heard it 300,000 time. I came to believe the negative talk. This book helped me break bad habits instilled by others.
I look forward to rereading it every year. I love this book. It helped change my live for the better. It says, that the average 18 year old hears, «no,» «you can’t do it,» «your not good enough,» and the like 148,000 times. I was especially rotten as a youth, I must have heard it 300,000 time. I came to believe the negative talk. This book helped me break bad habits instilled by others.
Rating the Idea of the Book: 5/5
Rating the Writing of the Book: 2/5
I started the book with a lot of expectations, convinced that I will be able to get a gameplan by «Dr» Shad Helmstetter. Being a behavioral «researcher», I expected the book to be filled with actual research, reference to scientific studies, etc.
How wrong I was. The narration comes across as a hypocritical «uncle» speaking.
The book starts with shitting on other self-help books, so I felt convinced that this is the book I should Rating the Idea of the Book: 5/5
Rating the Writing of the Book: 2/5
I started the book with a lot of expectations, convinced that I will be able to get a gameplan by «Dr» Shad Helmstetter. Being a behavioral «researcher», I expected the book to be filled with actual research, reference to scientific studies, etc.
How wrong I was. The narration comes across as a hypocritical «uncle» speaking.
The book starts with shitting on other self-help books, so I felt convinced that this is the book I should read and practice to change my inner narrative or «programming» before I could begin to reshape my life. But the next few chapters just keep rehashing the same idea again and again and again and again and again. Without any actual scientific evidence, just using plain old tangents and word vomits.
He goes on to shit on motivational speakers, and explains really well the difference between instrinsic and extrinsic motivation. That part was good. But then spends the majority of the next few chapters acting and speaking like one! Like, bro, practice what you preach.
And one part of the book was downright problematic. Here:
«Any of us can talk ourselves into depression and discouragement—and we can as easily talk ourselves out of it.»
NO! NO NO NO NO NO NO! As much as we’d want to believe that Depression (the mental illness) can be rid with Yoga and positive thinking and self-talk, sometimes you do need medical intervention and professional help, and statements like these do little to alleviate the stigma that exists for getting help for mental illnesses.
I think that the author meant «feelings or periods of sadness» when he used the word «depression». But not making that distinction comes across as really ignorant and irresponsible from the part of «Dr» Shad Helmstetter.
«The primary reason for this success is that life coaches are “results” oriented, rather than therapy oriented. Well-trained life coaches are very effective in helping their clients produce realistic positive results in multiple areas of their lives—and they help their clients without using past-probing techniques of therapy and psychological counseling.»
The author just shit on Therapy as a viable practical source of help and instead promoted «life coaching» as a miraculous, snake oil treatment to life’s problems. That too with a full section on life coaching smack in the middle of a chapter that had nothing to do with it. It seems like a lazy after-thought from the author, «Oh, I just remembered I also run a life coaching business. Need to advertise, this page seems appropriate to place it.»
If you think you need therapy, PLEASE GO FOR IT!
Don’t get me wrong, despite the bad writing, advertorials, and some problematic ideas, I would still recommend this book as a read, but better done with this plan:
Again, the idea of changing the inner narrative is very interesting and definitely something I will be starting. I have personally been told that the way I talk of myself seems to underplay me. And there were some nice tips that the book provided.
Maybe the book presented ground breaking ideas when it was first published, but it has not aged well. I will be starting my own course of changing my self talk, but don’t think I will credit this book for being an activator. A catalyst? At best, maybe.
What To Say When You Talk To Yourself Summary, Quotes, And Review
1-Line Summary: What To Say When You Talk To Yourself by Chad Helmstetter teaches you why all external motivation is temporary and how to use self-talk to make a permanent and significant change.
Last update on 2022-02-23 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon
About the author
Chad is a bestselling author and has written more than 20 books on personal development in over 70 countries.
Yes, he is pretty popular in the self-help field.
The best thing about him is that he writes in a straightforward language that even a beginner who has never read about personal development could understand.
What To Say When You Talk To Yourself Summary (PDF)
In this book summary, I will share the best lessons I’ve learned from this book.
So without wasting any time…
Let’s dive right in!
Lesson #1: most self-help books don’t work
Have you ever wondered why so many people are unsuccessful, when many books are written on success?
Just go to a library, and you’ll find that many books claim to make you successful, yet people keep struggling to achieve even 10% success.
So, what’s the issue here?
Why aren’t those motivational self-help books working?
The author expresses deep concern about this issue.
When he was a kid, he contemplated all the motivational stuff and eventually became a student of “success.”
You may also have read and watched lots of motivational stuff, right?
Are you getting the results that those motivational speakers claimed?
Are you enjoying the success you expected?
Chances are, you are moving from one self-help book to another. And those great ideas are not working at all.
Let’s dive deeper and understand what’s causing the problem.
The author says that all those motivational ideas stay in our heads for a limited time.
What happens then is that we switch back to our old programming.
And those ideas vanish into thin air.
We have been programmed by the external world ever since we were born.
Do you believe it?
Most of our knowledge or information isn’t produced by us. It comes from other people.
Hold on for a moment. And reread the above line.
Let me make it easy to understand.
Every time you watch a motivational video or listen to a motivational speech, you consume potent ideas.
Which then affects your beliefs and attitude.
We all have a default state of mind. So, whenever there is a change in the state of our minds, we feel different.
When you take in motivational ideas, you feel energetic.
And when you hear failure stories, you feel depressed.
But over time, you switch back to your default state of mind.
Getting the point now?
That’s the reason motivation stays with you for a limited time.
And since you have conditioned your mind to remain in a particular state, it goes back to its default setting.
Then you wonder why those ideas have turned useless.
So, no matter how great an idea is, it will be useless if you are not prepared enough to incubate it or nurture it.
Imagine what you could have achieved if you had the right mindset?
Imagine what you could do if you were conditioned to be your best possible self?
Even right now, you are being programmed.
Even as you read these words, your mind takes in these ideas.
And whether you change for good or not, it’ll depend on your default programming.
Lesson #2: Change your inner programming to change your life
So, what the heck is this “programming”?
Let’s talk more about this.
The author gives a great analogy to explain this.
Compare your brain to a personal computer for a moment.
A personal computer has both hardware and software.
You can touch the hardware. But you can’t feel the software.
Yet, the software is what controls the hardware, right?
The same is with us, humans.
We are controlled by our minds, which act like software.
If we dig deeper, there are many things like attitude, beliefs, attitude, feelings, etc., which affect who we are and what we do.
As we talked earlier that programming is why we fail to reach our full potential.
Just think about it:
What if you could change that programming?
What if you could change it to achieve your desired goals?
It’d be amazing, right?
It takes time to change it. Why? Because it took years to develop.
You can’t change your inner-programming overnight.
Generally, the programming is made of what you consume from your environment.
The words you hear from your family and friends. The words you say to yourself.
The words you speak while talking to your friends.
They all leave an impact or impression on your default programming.
Put another way: they affect your subconscious mind.
So to change that programming for good, you’ll need to work on your subconscious mind.
Sound like a lot of work, right? Not really.
The author says that if you use self-talk the right way, you’ll be able to edit those internal programs and change them however you want.
Lesson #3: protect yourself from negative programming Of Mind
“Not all programming is bad for you.”
Just as not all things are bad, not all programming works against you.
Sadly, most of it is terrible. And stands as a wall between your success.
What you have to do is:
You have to break that wall by destroying your old programming and writing a new one instead.
Notice the first part: You have to break the wall that’s holding you back.
Again, it’s a lot of work.
The better approach is to protect yourself from that negative programming.
It’s a preventive measure. By doing so, you guard yourself against future troubles.
Thinking about what is positive and what is negative?
Here are a few examples of negative programming that you receive from other people:
“You are not good at [task/job].”
“You will never be able to achieve [goal].”
Here are a few examples of positive programming that you barely get from other people:
“You are good at what you do.”
“You’ll definitely achieve your [goal].”
Do you remember when was the last time someone said those encouraging words to you?
It’s not common, right?
But these days, due to the Internet, we hear lots of motivational stuff.
But since we don’t really believe in all that due to our default programming, it becomes useless after a few days.
It doesn’t leave much of an impact.
The only way to protect yourself from negative programming is by practicing self-talk.
Self-talk is when you talk to yourself.
You can talk to yourself in many ways.
For instance, you can silently talk to yourself.
Or read out positive and encouraging sentences out loud.
Please don’t ask me what to read or say out loud. There is already so much motivation on the Internet, right?
Lesson #4: You are also programming others
You don’t realize it!
But YOU are also programming others.
It might not make sense, but everyone is programming everyone else.
We all have beliefs that we cherish so much.
We share ideas and stories that we believe in.
It’s human nature. We are social animals, after all.
Unconsciously, we spread our philosophies into this world. And whether we realize it or not, we program other people.
It’s neuroscience that works behind the scenes.
Many research and studies have been done by neuroscientists who study the neurons in our brains.
The question is:
How do we ensure that we are not giving negative programming to other people?
This question, again, brings us back to practicing self-talk.
If your programming is correct, you’ll naturally give the right programming to others.
And conversely, if your programming is negative, you’ll naturally spread negative programming onto others.
By breaking your old programming and talking to yourself, you can destroy your limiting beliefs.
This is important.
Why? Because we are continually receiving programming from other people, too – whether we want it or not.
If we are not conscious of our programming, we only delay our inevitable failures.
Bad programming will hurt you. Yes, it’s true.
We don’t realize how often our bad programming destroys the opportunities that life brings us.
Lesson #5: Motivation is a myth
The author says that all external motivation is temporary.
If you’ve read everything above, you know already how your inner programming works against you most of the time.
External motivation doesn’t last because we switch back to our old ways of doing things.
We never put those great ideas into action.
That’s why most people fail!
Because if we all put those ideas into action, we all have had become successful like Elon Musk.
We are shooting for the permanent change that would help us achieve our goals and reach our full potential.
According to the author, the best way is to change what we believe.
If we believe in the right things, we will probably take the right action and get results.
Make sense? Okay.
Now let’s get rid of some doubts that most people have about practicing self-talk.
Lesson #6: Self-talk is not hypnosis
I don’t know why, but self-talk sounds like some other-worldly thing.
Usually, people are busy and never find time to talk to themselves.
And when they hear about self-talk, they think it won’t work for them. It’s not their fault.
It’s natural to ask:
How can one become more capable of achieving his goals by talking to himself?
You only get results when you take action. (Nothing can change this fact)
But what action you’ll take is determined by what you think and believe.
If you think, “I will never become a great writer,” you never will.
If you think, “I will never become successful,” you never will.
If you can’t even say to yourself that you will do something extraordinary in your life, chances are you won’t do anything significant in your life.
Why? Because you don’t simply believe that you can do it.
It may sound motivational, but it’s the truth backed by science.
The author clears the myth that self-talk is not hypnosis.
In case you don’t know:
The author says that when people are hypnotized, they enter into a trance state. And they are programmed during that time to believe certain things.
I don’t know much about it.
During hypnosis, you aren’t fully conscious.
But when you talk to yourself, you remain fully aware.
That’s the beauty of practicing self-talk.
During self-talk, you don’t force ideas onto your subconscious mind. You consciously try to change what you think and believe about yourself.
You deliberately try to change the bad conditioning that has been done to you.
Lesson #7: Goal-Setting should be easy
If you can’t break your goals down into small, manageable goals, you’ll find it difficult to accomplish them.
Setting big goals might encourage you.
But you should also know that goals don’t have to be too BIG all the time.
The author says that goals can be as simple as having some leisure time.
Most people make goal-setting unnecessarily complicated.
They set unrealistic goals.
And once their motivation wears off, they struggle for some time and eventually give up.
You don’t need to do that.
Set simple goals in the beginning.
Don’t make things harder.
Simple goals and commitments also help you build good habits.
Good habits take time.
You often need to cross a threshold to make good habits stick.
And making micro-commitments and accomplishing small goals first helps you make good habits last.
Another reason you shouldn’t make goal-setting hard is that we don’t have much time in our lives.
No matter who you are and what your situation is, we have only 24 hours in a day.
So if your goal is unrealistic, it won’t fit into your daily life.
Big goals take time.
This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t strive for significant achievements.
You need to make sure that you can find time for your goals.
You must not think of your goals as something different from what you do daily.
If you pay attention, we are always setting simple goals for ourselves.
Waking up before 6 AM.
Or going to the office before you get late.
These are all simple goals. And that’s the reason we accomplish them efficiently.
When we think of big goals as something unusual, we only make things harder.
The author says:
“If it’s not easy, it won’t work.”
Here is the thing:
Only simple ideas get executed. We often procrastinate on complex concepts.
So break the complex ideas into smaller ones and execute them.
What To Say When You Talk To Yourself Quotes
Here are some of the notable quotes by the author of this book:
“You’ll become what you think about most.”
“Not all problems are opportunities.”
“No idea, no matter how good, won’t work if it doesn’t get used.”
What To Say When You Talk To Yourself Review
Last update on 2022-02-23 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon
The book focuses on saying positive affirmations, which I’m not a big fan of.
If you love listening to affirmations, you might resonate with the author.
The part where the author talks about negative programming is genuine, though. I agree that self-talk affects how we think.
But I still find it challenging to wrap my head around the idea of self-talk changing our life.
Experience is essential to change how you see yourself and think about yourself.
If your life is not harmonizing with what you say to yourself, no self-talk or affirmations could change your life.
Overall, this is a decent self-help book.
I expected more from the author, though.
My rating of this book: 8/10
The Key Takeaways from What To Say When You Talk To Yourself Summary
Now it’s your turn
I hope you liked this summary and learned plenty of valuable lessons.
Now you tell me:
Do you believe that self-talk can help you change your old conditioning for good?
What self-limiting beliefs do you have right now? And how do you wish to overcome them?
Please let me know in the comments below.
Don’t forget to share this summary with your friends and family members to encourage them and help them break their lousy programming.
Thanks for reading!
FAQs about What To Say When You Talk To Yourself by Chad Helmstetter
Is it good if you talk to yourself?
Yes, talking to yourself help you clear your mind and stay focused. It also enables you to explore your mind and find limiting beliefs that are not conducive to your success.
What do I say when I talk to myself?
You can practice affirmations to motivate yourself a bit. But I recommend instead of pushing yourself to talk in your head, focus on thoughts that come into your mind. Try to understand their nature. Are they self-defeating or helping?
Why do I talk to myself a lot?
It’s not a problem. In fact, it’s a great habit to practice self-talk once in a while to connect to your deeper self. But as it is with anything in life, anything in excess becomes a problem. If you find yourself talking too much, your mind is agitated.
How do I stop talking to myself?
First, observe if you really need to stop yourself. If it’s affecting your peace of mind, take deep breaths and calm down. Allow yourself to relax a bit. Bring your attention to your breath. But this is no permanent fix. If your life is a mess, it’s challenging to keep yourself sane and control your thoughts.
Do geniuses talk to themselves?
Geniuses talk to themselves a lot. It’s a sign of having a solid understanding of your mind. And to be a genius, you must know how to handle your mind efficiently.
What to say when you talk to yourself short summary?
Talk to yourself as much as you can and understand the nature of your thoughts to cure yourself.
Is the book worth purchasing?
Yes, I highly recommend this book.
Where to buy What to say when you talk to yourself?
You can get the get book on Amazon: Check price
Next Steps: What to do after reading this book summary?
Step #1: Read more book summaries like this one.
Step #2: Reflect on your daily routine
Think about important things that your inner programming directs in your life.
Do an honest analysis if you need to change your programming or not.
Step #3: Watch a course on Self-Talk
I highly recommend this course if you don’t want to read tons of books.
Step #4: Purchase a Paperback Copy Of this book
You can learn even more lessons by reading this book. I recommend you purchase this book and support the author.
Want to consume more insightful, power-packed content like this in the future?
Note: This post may contain affiliate links. If you click through those links and make a purchase, I may earn a little something at no extra cost to you. Please read the disclaimer for more info.
The Brain Behind This Website
I’m Shami Manohar, the Founder of WizBuskOut. My obsession with non-fiction books fueled me with the energy to create this website. I read at least one book every week on business, critical thinking, mindset, psychology, and more. My mission is to educate and empower every individual through proper knowledge that works in real life.
Consider supporting me in my mission:
I invest a lot of time, energy, and money in things like softwares, books, design, videos, etc., to provide you with this level of quality content. If you love consuming my work and appreciate it, support me. This would help me provide even more value and help humanity attain wisdom.
2 thoughts on “What To Say When You Talk To Yourself Summary, Quotes, And Review”
Loved the contents as usual, always to the point and summarized for saving time and the same time, the gist if presented. Thank you for Sharing Shami and making a diference in people life, keep it go.
Thanks Patrick. Glad my book summaries are helping you.
What to Say When You Talk to Your Self Summary
ABOUT THE BOOK:
Blog Title: What to Say When You Talk to Your Self Summary
Name: What to Say When You Talk to Your Self
Author: Helmstetter
Download What to Say When You Talk to Your Self at: Audible
Buy What to Say When You Talk to Your Self at: Amazon
Buy What to Say When You Talk to Your Self at: Flipkart
Book size: 256 pages
Overview:
Before talking about the “What to say when you talk to yourself Summary” let’s first discuss the book’s author Shad Helmstetter. Dr. Shad Helmstetter, Ph.D. is the best-selling author of more than twenty books in the field of personal growth, his best-selling classic books include what to say when you talk to yourself, the power of Neuroplasticity and the 365 days of positive self-talk series, shad books are published in over seventy countries. Shad is the pioneering dean in the field of self-talk.
What to Say When You Talk to Your Self Summary author says that every person each of us is programmed from birth on, author says that as much as 75 percent and more of our programming may be negative and it is working against us, author has also shared ways to erase and replace past mental programs with healthy, new programs that can be positively life-changing, and this book is considered by many as one of the most important and helpful personal growth books.
What to Say When You Talk to Your Self Summary contains various chapters and shows various techniques which can reverse your negative programming and can fill your life with new and vital energy, in this book author says to learn to talk to yourself, learn the words-the right words-and use them, make success a permanent way of life with what to say when you talk to yourself.
Let’s begin with What to Say When You Talk to Your Self Summary:
Chapter 1 What to Say When You Talk to Your Self Summary:
Looking for a better way
“YOU ARE EVERYTHING THAT IS, YOUR THOUGHTS, YOUR LIFE, YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE.YOU ARE EVERYTHING YOU CHOOSE TO BE.YOU ARE AS UNLIMITED AS THE ENDLESS UNIVERS.” –What to say when you talk to yourself (Page 13)
In this book author said that almost every person wants the best life, not almost but everyone wants the best life, everyone wants endless opportunities, the fulfillment of dreams and everyone wants a chance to live each day in a way that brings a lot of happiness and success, some people want at least a successful job and career and a good personal life and some just want reasonable not much financial security. We expect various things from our lives and we deep inside our heart believes that we people deserve our fair and we have right to attain it,
But in this chapter author has asked a various question and asked us that have we ever wondered that even after expecting so much from life still why things didn’t turn the way we wanted? Why we don’t get things we want and we deserve? Why we find few people lucky and the majority of people not lucky? Why only a few people are productive and their life is filled with happiness and why majority people life is not the way they expected? The author says that is it some kind of fate destiny luck, the author asked do we have control of our lives on our hand? What are the things that hold us back? What is coming between our lives happiness and success? What is the wall that stands in our way?
In this chapter author spoke about his research, the very first study he did is on “human behavior.” In this study author says that it’s something you can get a degree in without ever really figuring out, author says human behavior is something that older people knew much before the younger people, author says that no matter how many college degrees your professors will give you, but some grey haired people would already figure out what human behavior is all about and was all about long before we were taught courses in the subject.
The second study author did was on motivational marketing, in this study author says that he learned what makes people do what they do even when they don’t want to do it, and when author completed his course at the end he understood that you can really make anyone do what you want them to do by using force, and force in this free world is nothing but an advertisement. Author has also spoken about academic psychology and says it’s a great field and it deserves respect because a lot of people have lived richer lives because someone who cared took time to listen.
The author says that in his journey and in his own career after understanding and learning mathematics, religion, psychology he has found a concrete solution to all the questions that how any normal an average individual can touch stars and can also keep both their feet on solid ground. How an individual can get success can get more than limits and can still stay on grounds, the author says that if you want to master your own future then you must first learn to manage yourself, and if you accomplish in managing yourself, then you will for sure master a part of what we call Life.
The author says when he was working for the human mind, he started looking for solutions for answers, he found many but he discovered only one solution.
Chapter 2 What to Say When You Talk to Your Self Summary:
The answers
Author says that even after reading so many self-help books and even after attending so many seminars why still people fail to get what they want in their lives, author says here problems are not with book or with seminars, because books contain various useful techniques which can really help, but here problem is with human mind, we fail to understand how our brain works, human brain is an incredibly powerful personal computer control center and each of us have that, our brain is capable of doing anything for us, anything reasonable that you’d like it to do for you, But we people should know how to treat out brain, if we treat our brain in a right way and carefully by giving our brain right direction then our brain will for sure do right things, our brain will work for us in a right way.
But if you give your mental computer wrong directions then your brain will go to wrong way and will for sure continue to respond to the negative programming that you and the rest of the world have been giving it without even being aware of it.
Chapter 3 What to Say When You Talk to Your Self Summary:
What Works and What Doesn’t
The author was in search of something that he sensed was missing from the books and messages and solutions of so many who had come before him and before all of us. It became obvious to the author that if the final solutions to a better life, more happiness and personal fulfillment had already been discovered, then something vital was missing; something that was so essential, so important to the whole the process of achieving success, that without it, the other solutions would not work, at least not for any length of time.
Why only a few people able to achieve successful life, why we return to our old programming and habits even after trying so hard, why Motivation works only for a few days, why even after trying to stay motivated and optimistic we return to same old we, The Author says Why Even the very best ideas which we found in bestselling books, even the ones that looked like they would work for certain, would work for a while and then slowly lose their importance in our lives. Exciting ideas, great breakthroughs, and inspirations for the mind which seemed to offer so much became once read books sitting forgotten on a shelf.
The author starts wondering, what the missing ingredient he finally realized that the missing ingredient was somehow connected to our individual programming? In order to learn that answer, and in order to learn what does work, he decided that it would help to first understand what does not work–and why.
WHAT ARE THE MISSING INGREDIENTS, WHICH AREN’T ALLOWING US TO BE SUCCESSFUL
The author shares the Missing Ingredients
1) The first missing ingredient is permanence. All “external” solutions are temporary. Even the best of the ideas work only for a time. Without constant attention and effort, even the most exciting success breakthroughs run their course and eventually end up on our list of “good ideas” and “good intentions.”
2) The second ingredient missing from most of the success literature is a knowledge of the physiological processes of the human brain based on what we now know about actual mind-brain functions. Without an understanding of the actual process by which the
human brain accepts information (programming) and, in turn, responds, directs and controls us, it would be difficult (or impossible) to create any success plan that worked and kept working indefinitely. The brain runs the ship. If you want to make a permanent change of any kind, you’ve got to follow the rules. If you want to make a change and make it stick, you’ve got to do it the way the brain works.
3) The third missing ingredient and the most important of all is a new, word-for-word set of directions, new programming to the subconscious mind (the control center of the brain). That means a specific “programming vocabulary” which is worded in a specific way, that anyone can use at any time, to erase and replace the old negative programming with positive, productive new directions.
Solution by author:
The only solution which includes all of the three missing ingredients is something called Self-Talk. Think for a moment about some of the things you would like to accomplish or achieve in your life-or even those smaller things you would like to change about your life right now. Your objective could be to earn more income, have a better family life, improve your skills, do better in school, do better at work anything at all. Whatever means you choose to make the change, unless you first begin to change your old “programming,” the years of conditioning that keeps you doing it the old way, the likely outcome is that what you want to accomplish will not work–or will not last.
Chapter 4 What to Say When You Talk to Your Self Summary:
New Discoveries
Shad says that DURING THE LAST few years, neuroscientists have learned that much of what we had suspected about the human brain is true: The brain operates very much like a personal computer. It’s not that simple, of course. For one thing, the brain is many times more powerful, in most respects, then the most powerful computers we have yet created.
Even though the adult human brain weighs only about sixteen hundred grams, about three pounds, and looks more like a lump of gray cauliflower than a desktop computer, the brain functions in some important ways much like the man-made computers which are patterned after it.
In non-technical language, a computer has three basic parts: a “video” screen, a keyboard, and a program disk. The screen is what we use to visually display what we are programming into the computer. The screen also displays the results-the words, numbers, or pictures that we want the computer to store or compute for us. The keyboard, much like a typewriter keyboard, is what we use to type in the directions and information we give to the computer. And the disk (in a personal computer it’s generally called a “floppy disk”) is a small sheet of magnetic recording tape onto which we record the information. Whatever we record or program onto that disk will stay there forever unless someone changes it by erasing the old information and leaving it blank, or by typing in new information. Each of us, along with our brain, has similar parts. In use, the computer’s video screen is comparable to our appearance and our actions-what we “display” to the world around us.
In a human being, the computer keyboard is the same as our five senses. Anything we hear, see, taste, touch, smell or anything we say to ourselves–is “programmed” into our brain through our keyboard:
Our five senses. A personal computer uses a “floppy disk” to record the program and the information which the keyboard feeds to it. In the human computer, the floppy disk is our subconscious mind. Everything we experience is recorded-programmed-into our subconscious minds.
To simplify the complex process of how and why the programming of the human brain affects us as much as it does, Shad ask us to take a quick, imaginary look into the brain’s central control room.
Control Room is the part of the brain where commands are received and where all the orders are handed out-the part of the brain that makes us feel good, work hard, and get things done. Or when not so well directed, it makes us slow down, fears the outcome, and stop dead-still in our tracks,
Now suppose you are standing in front of the control center of the brain, completely covered with literally tens of thousands of light switches, much like the light switches in our homes, one section of switches controls our moods, other section controls our emotions, health etc, Author says that Everything about us-our memory, our judgment, our attitude, our fears, our creativity, logic, and spirit–is controlled by the switches in our mental control room.
When any command is transmitted to the control room, the proper directions are sent to the appropriate panels of switches. Within a fraction of a second, some of those switches are turned off or turned on.
My Thoughts:
Hence it is Really Important for us to Good Right Self-Talk, because your talk will be listened by your brain and your brain will switch off and on your programme, Hence understand It Very deeply “WHETHER YOU SAY YOU CAN OR YOU SAY YOU CAN’T YOU ARE RIGHT.” Always be very careful what you say to yourself because you are listening.
Chapter 9 What to Say When You Talk to Your Self Summary:
The five-level of self-talk
The author says that wanting to be a positive thinker isn’t enough; we people stay too busy fixing the train to realize that we are on the wrong track; the author says that if you want to manage yourself then the very first step is to change our programming.
Recognition and need to change
Decision to change
The author says that can use Five level of self-talk can be applied in countless situations:
Daily: the author says that we can change our attitude any moment we like, for example, if you plan to go out but suddenly rain started, then instead of feeling upset about it think something positive and change your mood and attitude about a particular situation
Miscellaneous contexts: This focuses on Problem-solving; getting organized, “selling”, and shifting over-used “carrot or stick” management approaches and more.
Specific issues: here author is talking about specific issues, for example, if you feel that you couldn’t save money? Hence you can think of reframing tight fiancés like you should put some amount of your earning aside every month, every week or year.
Healthy changing: here to decide to move from stress worry to freedom, here you choose to see the world around you in the bright healthy light you choose to see the world with a lot of optimism and self-assurance.”
This is the end of What to Say When You Talk to Your Self Summary. To understand each chapter and this book in detail do buy this book from the given link, this book contains various chapters and it’s one of the most important and an amazing book related to personal growth, so do buy it from the given links.
Download What to Say When You Talk to Your Self at: Audible
Buy What to Say When You Talk to Your Self at: Amazon
Buy What to Say When You Talk to Your Self at: Flipkart